Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt
by Detective Olivia Stabler
Summary: Elliot's search for a rapist is cut short when he is questioned as a suspect. As evidence seals the case against him, Olivia's secret may be his only chance at freedom. Will he come forward with the truth or keep the secret to protect his partner?
1. 1 Ball & Chain

_**Author's Note: This is an A/U, EO story. It is a story of friendship and love and the lengths Elliot will go to, to protect his best friend and partner. There is no Kathy in this story, Elliot was never married and there are no Stabler children. Although the topic of rape is discussed, there will be no actual rape scenes. This started out as a LONG EO one shot, but since it has already reached twenty five pages and I am not finished yet, I decided to go ahead and bust it into chapters so that I can start sharing it with you now. I am anxious to see what everyone thinks of this one! Thank you for reading it. Hope you like it! Please remember to review! ~ Detective Olivia Stabler ~**_

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter One: Ball & Chain)_

Elliot sat at his desk trying to remember the last time he had seen her smile.

"What are you doing later?" he asked watching as Olivia dropped her pen and stretched.

She combed her fingers through her hair and yawned as she stared at him with tired eyes.

"Same thing you're doing. Finishing up reports and paperwork, we'll have our asses handed to us in the morning if this isn't finished by the time Cragen comes in."

Elliot scratched the back of his head and laughed.

"Somehow I was hoping the phrase 'having a drink with you' would come out of your mouth. I'll buy," he tempted.

"And it might be the last thing you buy if this doesn't get finished. Get to work, Stabler."

"Old ball and chain."

Olivia laughed and Elliot was pleased to see her smile again. Lately the Riverside rapist had kept them up to their asses in paperwork with no way out in sight. Few leads and no suspects, they had been trapped here in this office for the last two weeks.

"Ball and chain? You talk as if we're married."

"Who needs a wife when I've got you to keep me on track? Our partnership is like a marriage."

"How exactly?"

"Well, think about it. We share most of the important things married couples do. We are loyal and faithful to our partnership, fully trust one another and would do anything for each other….minus a few _intimate_ details."

"If this is your way of asking me to have sex with you….the answer is no," she joked. "Now that that's all settled, back to work."

"Alright," Elliot laughed. "But the least you can do is let me buy you dinner tomorrow night to celebrate you're birthday."

"God, I was hoping you'd forgotten like everyone else," she groaned.

"Never. Infact I have already made reservations."

"You have?"

"Yes. I'll pick you up at seven. Wear something….nice."

"What?" she asked looking down at her casual dress. "Faded blue jeans and my NYPD sweatshirt aren't good enough for you?"

Elliot smiled.

"I am taking you somewhere elegant. And I don't think jeans and sweatshirts fit the dress code. If I have to wear a tie, you have to wear a dress."

"What kind of dress?"

"A dressy dress," he said.

"Suit or tux?"

"Tux."

"Tux? What kind of place is this?" she asked with a smile.

"Like I said, it's elegant."

"I appreciate it, El. I really do. But this is too much."

"No arguing. It's a waste of breath anyway, because you are not going to talk me out of it. Just be ready at seven."

"Seven," she agreed with a nod, "got it."

"Good. Now lets get this paperwork done, Cinderella. So we can go to the ball."

Olivia shook her head as she picked up her pen once more.

Two hours later Elliot dropped the last of his files on the top of the completed stack.

"Finished," he said standing to stretch. "How you doing? You need help?"

"Nope," she said shaking her head as she sighed the last document. "I'm finished as well."

"Now, how about that drink?" he asked.

"Elliot, it is two thirty in the morning," Olivia said looking at her watch. "All I want to do is go home and crawl into bed for a couple of hours before I have to get up and be back in here tomorrow."

"I see how you are."

They turned at attention as they heard a commotion in the hall.

"What the hell?" Elliot mumbled as he pushed the door open to see Fin escorting a man in handcuffs past them and into a holding cell in the back.

"What is this?" Olivia asked as Fin made his way to his desk.

"A guy I have had a hunch about for a while. Munch and I have been watching the area of the park where our three victims were attacked. This bozo has been walking through the area every night for the last week."

"Shopping for his next vic?" Elliot asked.

"Or revisiting his old hunting ground," Olivia noted.

"That's my bet," Fin agreed.

"Where's Munch?" she asked.

"We approached our friend here, we were gonna bring him in for questioning and he swung on Munch. I wrestled him to the ground and got the cuffs on him. He's high on something and reeks like booze. I figured I'd let him chill in there for a little while before I try to question him again."

"Is John okay?" Olivia asked in a concerned voice.

"I'll be fine," he said entering the room with tissue stuffed in both sides of his nose. "Just trying to stop the bleeding."

"Are you sure it isn't broken?" Olivia asked, her motherly instinct kicking in as she rushed to inspect his wounds.

"It's okay."

"It isn't broken, But it's probably going to be all puffy and swollen in the morning. You should put ice on it to help with the swelling. Here," she said opening her purse and dumping out a couple of Tylenol handing them to him, "you should take these every three hours or so. You'll probably be in a lot of pain tomorrow."

"Thanks. Are we ready to question this jerk," he asked looking at Fin.

"I don't know, man. You're already wounded, maybe you should sit this one out. Besides, you are liable to set him off if you step in that room."

"He's right," Elliot said stepping forward. "Why don't you head home? I'll run interference with Fin for a while."

"Are you sure?"

"I got this," Elliot agreed.

"Alright," Munch said grabbing his jacket and heading toward the door.

"How are we gonna do this?" Olivia asked walking to the back of the room to get another look at their suspect.

"I've already called Casey and Cragen, they're on their way," Fin said.

"Why don't you head on home and get some sleep?" Elliot asked Olivia.

"You guys might need help in there."

"You have not slept in two days and you're exhausted. Get some rest."

"Elliot, I'm alright. Just give me a minute to grab a cup of coffee and I'm good. We can just do this in rounds."

Elliot exhaled.

"At least catch a nap in the cribs. I'll take the first shift. I'll wake you in a few hours."

Olivia pressed her lips together and looked over her shoulder as Casey got off the elevator.

"Alright, but you know where I am if you need me."

Elliot watched until she had disappeared into the cribs.

"You ready," Fin asked standing beside the door to the interrogation room.

"As ready as I will ever be," Elliot said following him in.


	2. 2 Lyle Thompson

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Two: Lyle Thompson)_

Fin and Elliot worked for hours trying to get something they could use from this guy, but it was no use. Elliot walked out of the room to take a break. He groaned and made his way to the coffee pot.

"Are you ready for second shift?" Olivia asked from behind him.

"Hey," he said turning to see look at her.

"Why don't you take a break and let me step in for a little while?"

"Yeah, maybe you'll have better luck."

Olivia poured two cups of black coffee and headed into the interview room.

"Detective Benson," Fin said nodding in her direction.

"Detective Tutuola," she said handing him a cup of coffee.

She stopped for a moment to look at the suspect. Olivia watched as the may looked her over from head to toe.

"Can I get some coffee?" he grunted.

"Actually, I brought you a cup," she said. "But I thought we could talk first," she said sitting down across from him.

"I've seen a lot of cops, but never have I seen a lady cop as hot as you. Why aren't all lady cops as hot as you?"

Olivia didn't respond.

"This is how this is going to work," she explained. "I will ask the questions and you will do your best to answer them. You tell me what I want to know and I can have you out of here in time for breakfast."

The man stared at her then looked back at Fin.

"She's a lot nicer than you are."

"Damn right she is," Fin replied. "I done wasted all of my nice in the first four hours I sat in this room with you. I am way past nice."

The man leaned forward to look at Olivia.

"I will talk to you and only you," he said shooting a glare in Fin's direction.

"Let's start with your name. Your _real_ name."

"Lyle."

"Lyle?"

"Lyle Thompson."

"Mr. Thompson, can you tell me what you were doing in the park earlier this evening?"

"I was walking."

"Just walking?

"Yeah, until him and his friend showed up."

"And that is when you assaulted Detective John Munch?" she asked folding her arms in front of her and leaning back in her chair.

"That guy put his hands on me."

"We were just trying to talk to you," Fin argued.

"Lyle," Olivia said leaning forward to get his attention, "do you always walk in the park at two o'clock in the morning?"

"Sometimes. I like to walk."

"What were you looking for?"

"Oh, no. I'm not saying anything else."

"I'm not looking to bust you. I just need to know if you may have saw anything, while out on your walks."

"You're talking about them whores that got killed?"

Fin shifted obviously in protest, but held his tongue.

"I am," Olivia agreed sliding the cup of coffee across the table to the man.

"Didn't see nothing," he said picking up the cup and drinking the coffee in one shot and crumpling the paper cup in his hand as he belched.

"Looks and manners," she said sarcastically to Fin.

Fin and Olivia stood to leave the room.

"What about me?" Lyle asked from the other side of the table.

"Lock him back up," Olivia told the uniformed officer on the other side of the door.

"You can't do that!"

"Actually, we can. We can hold you for up to twenty four hours for questioning. By my calculations you still have," Olivia tipped her arm and looked at her watch, "fourteen and a half hours of our hospitality."

Olivia smiled as she exited the little room and the officer lead him back to the holding cell.

Olivia looked frustrated when she walked out of the room.

"No luck, huh?" Elliot asked walking in from the cribs.

"He toyed for us for hours and didn't give us anything we can use," she groaned as she poured herself another cup of coffee.

"You got his name. That's more than we got from him," Fin said patting her on the back.

"I'm just so tired and hungry," she said sitting down at her desk.

"All we've got it time," Elliot said pulling a menu from his desk drawer. "Let's order some breakfast from the deli down the street and take a little break. We try again in a little while and just keep him on ice for a little while."

"Sounds like a plan," she said.

After breakfast they took rounds questioning the man nearly all day. Elliot and Olivia slipped out long enough to go testify in court for another case they had been working on.

That afternoon Elliot checked his watch as he began to get nervous.

"Something wrong?" Fin asked watching as Elliot glanced at his watch again.

"I figured we would have this wrapped up by now."

"You in a hurry?"

"I made dinner reservations, for Olivia's birthday. It took me weeks to get them."

"What time?"

"Eight. But I still have to pick up her gift and we need time to get ready."

"You don't have a gift picked out yet?"

"I do. I ordered it. I just have to go pick it up."

"Well, we didn't get much out of this jerk before we had to cut him loose. They got uniforms shadowing him for a little while. You go and get things ready for Liv's birthday dinner. I can finish up here."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, it's just a little paperwork and if they should page us to go pick him up I can take Cragen with me. I'll page you if we need you. And I'll make sure Olivia gets out of here by five."

"Thanks man," Elliot said grabbing his keys and heading out the door.


	3. 3 The Gift

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Three: The Gift)_

Olivia was putting on her earrings when her doorbell rang a few hours later.

"You're early," she said as she opened the door to see Elliot standing there with a dozen white roses.

"Happy birthday," he said as she smiled.

"Aww, thank you. Come on in. I'm almost ready."

Elliot followed her into the apartment and watched as she pulled a vase from under the counter to put the roses in.

"You know El, you make this having a birthday without a boyfriend a lot easier to deal with."

"Well, no one should be alone on their birthday. And I know this one has kind of been bothering you."

"I am thirty six today. I'm not married and I have no children. Both of which I would like to have before I die. It's a little depressing."

Elliot smiled.

"It's not that bad," he said.

"Maybe for you. Being the sexy single bachelor is a cool thing for men. At the rate I'm going I am likely to be a childless old maid."

"Enjoy the single life, Liv. Don't rush things. There is still time for a husband and kids."

"El, unlike men who can father children in their sixties, every day I wait reduces my chances of ever becoming a mother."

"Maybe you will meet someone soon."

"Maybe," she said turning to pick up her purse and toss a lipstick into it.

"You look beautiful, by the way."

"Thank you," she said with a smile.

"Shall we?" he asked standing and offering her his arm.

Olivia slipped her arm around his as Elliot lead her to the cab he had waiting for them. They sat at a beautiful table for a candlelit dinner drinking wine and eating over priced food. But Olivia was laughing and smiling and having a good time and that made it worth every penny. Work had been so stressed and busy at work lately that neither of them had been on a date in months.

"How is the lamb?" he asked as she took another bite.

"Amazing. How's your steak?"

"Probably the best steak I have ever eaten in my life."

"Better than the chilled avocado soup?" she asked with a smile.

"That was really bad," Elliot laughed. "I guess I am not big on fancy foods, but I wanted to take you somewhere nice for your birthday and this place has incredible reviews."

"Well, their lamb chops melt in your mouth. I can see why. The salad has seven summer greens in it and the wine is all imported. This place is like a little piece of heaven right here in New York City."

Just then a group of servers made their way toward their singing happy birthday.

"Elliot," she laughed as a big smile crossed her face.

Their waitress sat a large piece of some fancy looking kind of cake on the table in front of Olivia and Elliot smiled at her over the glow of the sparkler in it.

"Make a wish," he said as she looked up at him with tears in her eyes.

Olivia pulled the sparkler from the cake and stared at it for a few moment before she closed her eyes. When the firework had burned out, she set it aside on a saucer and picked up her fork.

"It is so pretty I don't even want to cut it," she said as they studied the cake intricately decorated with little white pearls and hand shaved coconut.

Olivia cut off a bite with her fork and slid it into her mouth.

"Oh my gosh! This is so good," she mumbled through her mouth full of cake.

She handed Elliot his fork.

"You have to try this," she said with a smile.

"That is good. What kind is it?"

"Italian cream cake. It's my favorite. So amazing!"

She looked up at Elliot who was smiling.

"But you already knew that, didn't you?"

"I did. I requested it."

"You know, for a guy you pay great attention to detail."

"I'm a cop, it's part of my job. And you are my best friend, I wanted this birthday dinner to be perfect for you."

"It has been the most wonderful evening."

"Oh," Elliot said raising his pointer finger to pause the conversation, "I don't want to forget this," he said sitting a small gift bag on the table in front of her.

Olivia smiled as she leaned forward and looked inside. She removed the colorful tissue from the bag and pulled out a small gift box. Olivia paused to smile at him again before untying the ribbon and removing the lid.

"Oh Elliot," she gasped as stared down at it. "It's so beautiful. I love butterflies."

"It's real. The butterfly, it is a real butterfly in amber. I had it made special, just for you."

Olivia smiled again as she looked at the detail of the butterfly.

"I don't think I have ever seen one like this," she said as she studied the dark blue and teal colors of the insect.

"I told them I wanted something unique. Something special."

"It is special. It is from my best friend," she said holding her hair up so Elliot could clasp the necklace around her neck.

He straightened out the white gold chain and held the pendant between his fingers for a few moments.

"You really like it?" he asked.

"I love it!"

"It isn't a little too 'Silence of the Lambs' for a birthday gift?"

Olivia laughed.

"No. It was a very thoughtful and unique gift, from the only person in my life thoughtful enough to think of something like this. And I love it!"

"Good. But if you hate it, you can tell me. I wont be offended. I can take it back for the pair of diamond earrings I was gonna get."

"No! It's perfect. Besides, I have three pairs of diamond earrings. I only have one, one of a kind, made just for me butterfly necklace."

Elliot watched as she smiled.

"That makes this gift much more special than some dumb old earrings," she said as he kissed her forehead.

"I'm glad you like it."

Elliot poured them another glass of wine and they danced a few dances and Olivia had the best birthday she had ever had.


	4. 4 Evidence

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Four: Evidence)_

Over the next couple of weeks they continued their search for the Riverside rapist. With few leads and three new victims, they always seemed to be two steps behind the attacker.

Elliot walked in and tossed the morning paper on his desk. He fixed himself a cup of coffee and turned to notice that Olivia hadn't arrived yet.

"Hey Fin, you heard from Liv?" he asked staring the empty chair in front of her desk.

"Nope," Fin answered.

"That's strange. She is almost always here before me and I was late today."

"Olivia has taken some personal time," Cragen said as he walked into the bullpen.

"Personal time?" Elliot asked. "Is she okay?"

"She said she was fine. She just needed a few days. _Personal_ days. Personal as in she doesn't have to tell me why she needs them. You'll be working with me until she returns. First thing's first, what the hell is this?" he asked pointing to the picture on the front page of the paper.

"Looks like the press is having a hay day with this," Elliot said scratching his head. "They already caught wind of our latest victim?"

"We have no witnesses, no evidence and one suspect that we can't put away. We have to find a way to get this guy," Cragen said.

"He has also spanned out from the park. We think this latest victim was stalked. He had to have found her someplace else. He watched her for a while, got to know her routine. Then he followed her. He raped her in the alley behind the restaurant where she worked and slammed her head against the wall repeatedly. We're waiting for the autopsy results from Warner, but we suspect cause of death had something to do with the head wound."

"It's been verified," Fin replied. "I just got a call from Warner. Last night's victim died as a result of brain trauma."

"He beat her to death with a brick wall," Elliot thought out loud.

"We have to find this monster before he kills again. He's getting good at it now, he isn't going to stop on his own," Fin said.

"Alright," Cragen said breaking up the conversation. "This guy has got way too many bodies to his name and he's picking up the pace. We have had four in the last two weeks. Munch and Fin, get over to Warner's and see if she found anything that can help us nail this guy."

"Elliot…."

"Captain, if you can spare me for an hour or so, I'd like to go check on Olivia."

"Do that. One hour, then get back here. I'm going to start going back over the files from the other victims and try to find something to tie Thompson to these murders."

Elliot headed over to Olivia's apartment. He took the elevator up to her floor and knocked on the door. He stood there for a few minutes waiting for her to open the door. After about five minutes he called her cell phone.

"Hello," she said softly.

"Hey you, everything alright?"

"Fine."

"I've been knocking for about five minutes. I was getting worried."

"I was taking a nap. You have a key."

"The chain is locked. Can you come let me in," he said as she opened the door.

"I didn't mean to scare you."

"You look like hell."

"Thanks, El. I feel like hell. I have done nothing but vomit for the last two days."

"What happened here?" he asked brushing his thumb over her busted lip.

"I fell on the stairs," she explained. "The power went out and had to take the stairs in the dark. Like I said, I've been sick."

"This from your fall too?" he asked pushing back her hair to inspect a mark on her forehead.

"Yes. It's just a scratch. Really, I'm fine. The doctor said I'll be fine in a few days. I just wanted a little break from the stress of work."

"That makes sense. Why don't you lay back down and get some rest? I'll bring you some dinner after work."

"Yeah," she said softly.

"You never get sick. I want to check on you."

"It's just a virus or something. It'll pass."

"I'll see you later," he said stepping back into the hall to leave.

Olivia locked the door made her way into the kitchen for a glass of water. She twisted the cap off her prescription bottle and dumped a couple of pills into her palm.

"This three times a day shit is killing me," she mumbled pinching her nose as she tossed the pills into the back of the throat chasing them with water.

She groaned and walked back into the bedroom, climbing across the bed and pulling the blanket up around her shoulders.

"There you are," Cragen said as Elliot walked back into the bullpen. "How is she?"

"She's sick. But the doctor says she'll be fine in a few days."

"That's good," Cragen said tossing Elliot a set of car keys. "Come on."

"Where are we going?"

"Warner found new evidence. Seems our perp left a partial thumb print on this one."

"I thought they dusted the body for prints?"

"This guy wants his girls to watch him as he is raping them. He forced her eyes open. And when he was finished with her, when she was dead, he had to touch her."

"Touch her?"

"He closed her eyes. But he had already removed his glove."

"She pulled a print from the eyelid?"

"Partial, from the cornea."

"She lifted a print from the victim's cornea? He put his thumb in her eye?"

"Apparently so."

"We ran the print in the system and popped up our friend…."

"Lyle Thompson."

"Casey's gonna have our warrant waiting for us. Munch and Fin are headed to his place of employment to pick him up. You and I are running the search of his home."

Cragen and Elliot assisted a team of uniformed officers as they searched the Thompson home. They searched everything with no luck and were just about to give up when Elliot heard Cragen call to him from the back house.

"I've got something back here!"

Elliot made his way down the hall to the bedroom to find his boss standing in the middle of the bed. A ceiling panel laid at his feet and he held an old cigar box full of little baggies.

"Drugs?" Elliot asked.

"No, jewelry."

"Souvenirs."

Cragen stepped down and dumped the box out on the bed to inspect the pieces.

"Each one from one of his victims," he said.

"There are dozens. That son of a bitch has taken more than we knew about."

"Each piece of jewelry has a newspaper clipping or obituary, from the victim who owned it."

"Julie Paige, Niccole Phillips, Annabeth Pressely, Kaitie North. We had no idea he was tied to any of these."

"The dates go back over two years. This man has been a serial rapist and murder for years, praying on the women of this city," Cragen said.

"And other places," Elliot pointed out. "Kaitie North was from Cedar Falls, Iowa. Here's one from Philadelphia. We have to get this monster!"

"What do you make of this one?" Cragen asked holding up one of the bags. "This one doesn't have a clipping."

Elliot grabbed the bag from Cragen and held it up to the light to look at the necklace inside.

"This one's not dead," he said dropping the bag on the bed. "Not yet anyway."

Elliot turned to leave the room.

"Where are you going?" Cragen asked.

"Our only hope of solving this case, is to find the owner of that necklace. She is the only one who survived."


	5. 5 The Secret

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Five: The Secret)_

An hour later Elliot stood in front of Olivia's apartment door, this time holding a paper bag from the deli down the road from her apartment. Olivia smiled softly as she opened the door and he could tell by the way she looked how bad she felt.

"Still sick, huh?"

"All day. It should pass soon, though."

"I hope you're hungry."

"Starving. I haven't been able to eat anything all day. What did you bring?"

"Cheese burgers and fries. Get well food of champions."

Olivia laughed.

"Nothing better to help me get back on the horse than greasy cheeseburgers and fries."

"It was that or your favorite double cheese and pepperoni pizza. But I walked past the deli and smelled the amazing aroma fresh beef sizzling on the grill."

Olivia smiled again.

"And the grease stains on the bag mean they are the best."

"That's right," he said pointing at her.

Olivia walked around the counter and pulled two plates from the cabinet as Elliot pulled out the food.

"One deluxe grill burger and fries," he said setting his on his plate. "And one with cheese and bacon only," he said sliding her plate to her.

"Cheese and bacon?" she asked.

"I know you are a mustard, pickle and onion girl, but I thought maybe since you have been nauseous for the last couple of days all the grease from the burger was probably pushing it enough."

"Good thinking," she agreed.

"Oh, and a diet coke," he said handing her the cup.

"Thanks, El."

They sat on the sofa as she picked at her food.

"How is it?"

"Good."

"Too soon for burgers and fries?"

"I think so," Olivia said sitting the plate on the coffee table as she placed one hand against her stomach.

Elliot raised his palm to feel her forehead and stared into her eyes.

"It's the antiretrovirals," he said and her eyes widened.

"Wha….how did you….?" she stammered as tears filled her eyes.

Elliot gulped as the reality of the situation set in.

"Oh God, no."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," she whispered as she began to cry.

"When did it happen?"

"The day before yesterday," she said softly. "It was Thompson. I thought he was going to kill me. He hit me, I tried to fight him off, but he just kept hitting me. He pushed me forward and slammed my head against the car. I just pretended to be dead."

"That may have saved your life. You are the only one who survived."

"How did you know?"

"Cragen and I searched his house and found a box of jewelry he took as souvenirs from his victims. Each piece was in a baggie with the newspaper clipping about the woman he killed to get it. All but one of them." Elliot paused to stare into her eyes. "I recognized the butterfly."

Olivia wiped her eye with the back of her hand and walked toward her bedroom. Elliot sat on the sofa feeling like an ass not sure of what to say to her. A few minutes later he stood against the frame of her bedroom door watching as she laid on the bed and cried.

"Liv," he said softly as he sat on the edge of her bed, "I am so sorry. I'm sorry he hurt you and I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. When we find this guy….I'm gonna kill him."

Elliot watched her for a moment, but she didn't respond.

"I'm here if you want to talk about it," he said feeling a knot rising in his throat.

He watched her stare at the wall in silence for a few more minutes and could tell she was crying.

"I should go," he said standing up. "You probably want to be alone right now."

"Please don't go," she said through tears as she turned to look at him. "I want you to stay."

"Then I'll stay. As long as you need me to."

He laid back beside her on the bed as she began to cry again. Elliot raised his hand to cup the side of her face and kissed her forehead.

"You wanna tell me about it?" he said softly.

"I couldn't sleep," she whispered as she began telling him the details of her attack, "so I got up early and went for a run. I was walking through the back parking lot to come back inside, when he grabbed me. He was behind me and grabbed me by the hair. He knew who I was because he kept calling me detective. He twisted my arms behind my back and pinned me against a car. I fought him as he….he was raping me. He had a gun and he kept pressing against the side of my head. At one point I turned enough to see his face and that's when he hit me. He tightened his hands around my throat, I thought I was gonna die. That's when I got the idea to play dead. I closed my eyes and he grabbed me by the hair and slammed my head against the car. When he did the alarm on the car beside us went off and he let go of me. I fell to the ground and didn't move. He ran away and I just laid there for a little while, but no one came. I got up and went to my car, I drove to the clinic and had a rape kit done. They started me on the antiretroviral therapy just in case."

"They made me sick for the first week or so when I had to take them. But you get used to them. Honey, I wish you had told me. I would have been here for you, you know that."

"I didn't want you to know. I don't want anyone to know."

"Liv, we all love you. We're your family. And we would do anything for you."

"I know that," she said softly. "I guess I'm just not ready to face it yet. Part of me still can't believe it happened. I should have been able to fight him off."

"This wasn't your fault. He had a gun. If you had fought him any harder he would have killed you. You survived…."

"I know the speech," she said cutting him off. "I give it at least three times a week. But I am trained. I am a cop for God's sake! I should have been able to fight him off."

"Hey," Elliot said slipping his hand into hers as she began to cry again, "no one blames you for this. And I wont, I wont let them."

He pulled the blanket up around her and tucked her in.

"You should try to get some rest."

"I can't sleep. I have tried. I am so tired and I can't sleep. I just lay here and think of him and the things he did to me. I close my eyes and I see his face. I cant get him out of my head and I think I'm going crazy."

"Not tonight. I'm here with you now and I'm not going anywhere. I am going to be right here beside you, you are safe now. I'll protect you."

Elliot raised up his arm as she scooted in against him nestling the side of her case against his chest. He closed his arm around her and held her.

"Close your eyes and try to sleep," he whispered kissing the top of her head.

"El, what if they don't get him?"

"Don't you worry about that. We will catch him," he assured her. "I wont stop until this bastard pays for the things he has done to you."

Elliot spoke softly, whispering calming words to help her feel safe. He reached up with his free hand to wipe away his tears from his eyes as he gently kissed the top of her head. Elliot watched as she yawned softly and drifted off to sleep.


	6. 6 Hiding

_**Author's Note: This is the last chapter I have prepared as of right now. This story started off as a long one shot and I went back and broke it into chapters. I have just started school again, so it may be a little while between updates, but I will do my best to keep up with these stories and update as often as I can. Thank you all for the reviews! ~ Detective Olivia Stabler ~**_

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Six: Hiding)_

The next morning Elliot opened his eyes to find Olivia still sleeping peacefully in his arms. He smiled and combed his fingers though her hair as he kissed the top of her head. Olivia stirred a little and opened her eyes.

"What time is it?" she whispered still half asleep.

"About eight thirty. How'd you sleep?"

"Pretty good, actually," she said with a smile.

"Do you feel like you could eat?"

"I don't know, maybe."

"Why don't I make you some of your favorite pancakes? They're a little lighter on the grease."

"That sounds really good," she said with a smile.

"You wait here. I'll be back in a few minutes and bring you breakfast in bed."

"I think I'm gonna take a hot shower."

"Alright," Elliot said. "I'm right down the hall if you need anything."

"Thanks, El."

Olivia stepped under the hot water and let is pour down over her sore and wounded body. She closed her eyes and rested her head against the wall and just stood there feeling the heat of the water as it soothed her achy muscles.

Twenty minutes later she joined Elliot in the kitchen.

"That smells amazing," she said as she took a seat at the bar and he handed her a cup of coffee.

"I made bacon, too. If you think you stomach it."

"I'm going to give it one hell of a try," she said with a smile.

"That's my girl."

Elliot made her a plate of food, then sat down beside her to enjoy his breakfast as well.

"You put peanut butter on them," she noted.

"Peanut butter pancakes are your favorite."

"No El, _your_ peanut butter pancakes are my favorite. Aren't you going to be late for work?"

"I'm taking the day off."

Olivia raised her eyes to look at him.

"Cragen it gonna be pissed."

"I don't care what Cragen thinks. If he thinks I am leaving you alone now, he's crazy."

"El, he doesn't know that anything has happened."

"And he's not going to know," Elliot said turning to look at her.

Olivia sipped her coffee as she stared at him.

"I'll have to tell them eventually. I know that."

"No. Look Liv, you are the only one who survived. And the only reason you're alive now is because Thompson thinks he already killed you. If you step forward with this, if you tell anyone and word gets out, he is going to come after you. You saw his face. You can identify him. You're a loose end. If you come forward, he goes to prison for the rape and murders of twenty two women."

"I don't know what to do, El. If I don't come forward then a serial rapist and murder walks free and those victims, those women, never get justice."

"You win some, you lose some."

"Elliot, I thought you said Munch and Fin picked this guy up?"

"They didn't get him. I spoke to Cragen this morning and they have no idea where he is. He is still out there and if we come forward he _will_ come after you. The only way to guarantee your safety….is for you to stay dead. As far as he knows. We should get you out of here, too. If he catches on that you are still alive, this is the first place he'll come looking for you."

"You mean leave the city?"

"Maybe, if it gets that bad. Right now I'll book a hotel room and you'll have to lay low for a while. We can't risk him finding out you're still alive. I'm not going to let him hurt you again."

"I know that," she said softly as she placed her hand in his.

After breakfast Elliot called and made a reservation using his undercover name. Olivia packed a bag and he drove her to the hotel.

"You didn't have to get a suite, El."

"You don't like it?"

"No, the place is beautiful. But a room with a bed would have done just fine."

"You might be here for a little while and I want you to have plenty of space."

"You're staying, right?" she asked with a worried look.

"Of course. That's my bed right there," he said pointing to the pull out sofa.

Olivia smiled.

"There is a mini refrigerator, a garden tub and 24 hour room service at your fingertips. All the comforts of home," he joked.

"I guess if you have to be on house arrest, this is a good place to serve the time," she sighed as she stared out the window over the city.

"Why don't you get unpacked? We can find a movie and I'll order us some lunch."

As they sat on the sofa together watching television, Elliot's cell phone rang.

"It's Cragen, probably about the case," he said stepping out onto the balcony to take the call. "Stabler," he said as his boss began to speak.

"Elliot, we have a problem."

"What's going on? They couldn't find Thompson?"

"We're still looking. But it's worse than that."

"What?"

"IAD wants us to bring you in for questioning."

"For what?"

"Rape and murder," Cragen said clearing his throat.

"What the hell?"

"I'm not saying that any of us think you could have possibly done this. But they want you brought in just the same. Munch and Fin are on their way to your apartment now. I just wanted to give you the courtesy of a phone call."

"Listen, I'm not home right now. If you can give me half an hour, I'll be in."

"I'll stall them."

"Thanks, Captain."

Elliot hung up the phone and walked back inside. He stood for a moment and watched Olivia as she sat on the sofa eating a turkey sandwich and watching cartoons.

"Liv, we need to talk."

She muted the television and turned around to look at him over the back of the sofa.

"What's going on?"

Elliot stared at her for a moment, then decided not to worry her without reason.

"Cragen needs me to come in for a little while. Hopefully just a couple of hours, but I'm not sure."

"I'll be okay."

"Do you have your gun?"

"Of course."

"Good. Don't answer the door and I will call you as soon as I can."

Olivia nodded as he made his way to her. Elliot leaned down and kissed her forehead.

"I love you," he said staring into her eyes. "You know that right?"

"I love you too, El."

"And there isn't anything that I wouldn't do for you."

"I know that, too."

"We're family," he said placing his palm against hers and locking their fingers together. "And families look out for each other. Your secret is safe with me. It will never leave this room."

She nodded again and drew a staggered breath.

"You are coming back, right?" she asked sensing his nervousness.

"As soon as I can."

"I'll be here," she said softly.

"If you need anything use this cell phone to call my cell phone. Mine and mine only, alright?" he instructed handing her an untraceable prepaid phone.

"Yes."

"Use the land line for room service only and don't even turn you cell on."

"I left it back at my apartment so they couldn't trace it."

"Good thinking. I'll be back as soon as I can."

She watched as Elliot turned to leave.

"El," she said softly as she moved across the room to hug him, "be careful."

"Always," he replied hugging her tight and kissing the top of her head once more in an almost fatherly manner.

Olivia waved to him as he stepped out the door. Closing and locking it behind him, she couldn't help but worry for his safety as well as her own.


	7. 7 Trouble

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Seven: Trouble)_

"This is ridiculous!" Elliot protested as he paced the floor. "You have asked me the same questions every possible way you could ask them for almost twelve hours and my story hasn't changed a bit! What exactly are you trying to accomplish here?"

"Detective Stabler, it would be in your best interest to sit back down and cooperate with this interview."

"Interview, my ass! You're interrogating me, not because you actually have the evidence to put me away for the crime you are insisting I committed, but just to give me static. And you are wasting time! While you are in here showing your ass and asserting your authority, the real killer is out there hunting down his next victim!"

"Sit down!" the man shouted standing and glaring at him. "I suggest you start taking this seriously!"

"Alright," Elliot agreed spinning a chair around backwards and sitting down in it. "I have been taking this seriously from the beginning. I have not done anything or hurt anyone. I spend my life trying to protect victims and put away rapists and murders. Why on Earth would I suddenly decide to rape and murder…..what was the victim's name? Oh, that's right. You don't have one!"

"Pick one!" the man shouted tossing a stack of photographs of the victims dismembered bodies on the table. "Thirty two, last I counted. Is she number thirty three?" he said tossing the baggie containing Olivia's necklace onto the table.

Elliot stared at it for a moment as he fought back tears.

"How the hell should I know?" he said folding his arms in front of him and leaning back in his chair.

"Just tell us who she is. Give us the location of her body so her family can finally lay her to rest."

"You are dumber than you look, you know that?" Elliot asked staring up at the man. "We have the identity of the killer! Read your file! Thompson left his prints on two of the bodies and half of the jewelry! Why don't you put our tax dollars to good use and bring him in for questioning?"

"Oh, I have no doubt that Lyle Thompson was responsible for a good portion of these," he said spreading out the pictures in front of them. "But this one," he said picking up the butterfly necklace, "she's all yours."

"I'm finished talking to you," Elliot replied pushing the evidence bag across the table unable to look at it anymore.

"That's alright. We'll try again tomorrow, before your arraignment. Let's find Detective Stabler a place to rest for the night," he said as a uniformed officer stepped in to escort Elliot to central booking. "And see that he gets his own room, will you? I wouldn't want any harm to come to him before he goes in front of that judge in the morning."

Cragen watched helplessly as they cuffed Elliot and took him out the back way.

Olivia sat alone the hotel room looking out at the city lights. Something must be wrong, Elliot had never gone this long without speaking to her. Surely he wouldn't leave her here alone, knowing how worried she was about him.

She picked up her cell phone and dialed his number, but again it went straight to voicemail. Olivia hung up immediately without leaving a message, not wanting someone to be able to trace this number back to her. She sat down on the sofa and picked up the remote control, nervously flipping through channels until she had fallen asleep on the sofa.

A few hours later she awoke to a loud thud. She opened her eyes in the darkness and looked up at the ceiling trying to remember where she was. She reached forward and picked up her weapon from the coffee table then sat up to look around the room, but saw nothing.

Quietly she crept through the dark suite toward the bedroom. As she did a loud knock on the door startled her causing her to jump.

"Breathe Olivia," she whispered softly feeling her heart pounding in her throat as she made her way to the door.

But who could it be? She didn't order any room service and no one but Elliot even knew she was here and he had a key. She peered through the peep hole into the well lit hallway, but didn't see anyone.

Confused she turned to walk away. Then a second loud knock sounded through the room.

"Who's there?" she asked raising her gun, ready to fire if she needed to.

"Olivia, it's me. Open the door."

"Casey? What are you doing here?"

"Elliot called, he said he needed a favor. Can you open the door?"

Olivia looked through the little hole once more to see her friend standing there.

"Are you alone?"

"Yes, I am."

She reached forward and unlocked the door, then stepped back into the darkness.

"Okay. Open the door and step inside."

Casey shrugged and did as her friend asked.

"Liv? Why are you in the dark?"

"Turn around and put your hands against the door," Olivia instructed.

"What the hell is going on? I can't see anything!" Casey protested as Olivia patted her down. "Hey!"

Olivia locked the door again and turned the light on. Casey turned around to see her holding her cell phone in one hand and the battery in the other.

"Are you sure you weren't followed?"

"Pretty sure, why? What are you doing?"

"They can trace you," Liv said tossing her the phone, but holding on to the battery. "Why are you here? And where the hell is Elliot?"

"He was arrested."

"Arrested? For what?"

"Apparently some bogus crap about finding his fingerprint on some evidence or something. He used his one phone call on me. He gave me this address and told me to show my ID to the manager at the front desk. The man gave me this room number. I didn't even know you were here until you answered the door."

"He is trying to protect me."

"From me? I am not a threat to you, Olivia."

"I know that. Poor Elliot, he must be so…."

"He said he will be fine. He asked me to stay here tonight."

"But you didn't know I was here."

"Nope. He left a letter at the front desk asking me to stay here until hear from him again. But he can't very well call me if you tore up my phone."

"He won't call your phone, that can be traced."

"Do you mind telling me what is going on here? Elliot is in jail, which you didn't really even seem shocked by the way! And you are in hiding? And worried that someone might follow me or trace my calls?"

"I can't tell you, Casey. I'm sorry."

"Does it have to do with this murder Elliot purposively committed?"

Olivia took a deep breath and exhaled.

"It does," she said as she walked back across the room and turned the television back on. "Are you hungry? I can order some room service if you'd like."

"I'm good," Casey said pulling off her jacket and tossing it over a chair.

She sat down across from Olivia and couldn't help but stare at her friend.

"Do you think he killed that girl?" Olivia finally asked unable to take the silence any longer.

"Of course not. Why, do you?"

"I know he didn't."

Casey stared into her eyes.

"You know something don't you?"

"A lot more than I wish I did," Olivia said pulling her knees in against her chest.

"Do you know who she was?"

"Who?"

"The girl. The dead one they are saying Elliot killed."

Olivia shook her head.

"How much trouble is he in Casey? Can they keep him in jail for this?"

"If they get enough evidence to convince a jury."

"But he didn't do it."

"Unfortunately, that doesn't really matter anymore. If a jury believes that he raped and murdered this woman they will put him in prison for life."

"Can they do that?"

"It happens all of the time, Liv."

"No, I mean they can't possibly have enough evidence against him."

"They have a fingerprint. That puts him there."

"There has to be some kind of mistake! You know he never would have done something like this! Is a fingerprint really enough evidence to convict him?"

"From a professional point of view, I wouldn't think so. They don't even have a body for their so called victim. So that should slow things down a little bit. I put in a call to a friend of mine, a guy I dated back in law school. He is good, Liv. And he owes me a favor. He knows how quickly juries like to try and jump to a conviction when a cop is involved. I think he can really help Elliot."

"I hope you're right. So what's the plan?"

"They will take him in front of the judge tomorrow. He has a clean jacket with years of public service, so he will probably get ROR until the actual trial. But this isn't going to be easy, Olivia. Even if they don't convict, this is liable to follow him around for the rest of his life. It may not completely leave a mark on his career, but there will definitely be a smudge."

Olivia looked worried. Casey reached across and closed her hand around Liv's.

"You said they don't have a body?"

"It would be better for Elliot if they never found a body. But it will probably show up eventually."

"But what if there isn't one?"

Casey tipped her head a bit and studied the look on Olivia's face.

"Her necklace was in that box with all of the others, Liv. That means there is a body out there somewhere."

"But Thompson killed the others. Isn't it more likely that he was the one who attacked this victim as well?"

"Of course it is. But they panicked when they found Elliot's fingerprint on the necklace. They are running damage control, no one is quite sure how to handle this. And with out a body to search for DNA or other evidence we are kind of in Limbo here."

"Casey, what if they have found no body, because there is no body to be found?"

"You think she could still be alive? That is totally against Thompson's MO. Liv, if this girl is alive, we have to find her."

"If she came forward and could say without a doubt that Elliot is not the man who raped her….she could clear him, right? She should come forward. I mean, assuming she isn't dead. And there isn't a body, because she is still alive and out there somewhere."

"No!"

"No?"

"If Thompson is responsible for this victim and he didn't kill her, it wasn't for lack of trying. You have seen what he does to these victims. He never would have just walked away and let one live. If she is alive, we have to find her so that we can protect her. Get her into hiding. At least until we catch this bastard! No offense to Elliot, but I think her life is a little more important than this case. If we could get the judge to take a statement from her or see her in closed chambers, maybe. But parading her out into open court is like painting a target on her back! If she came forward and the press caught wind of this, he would kill her for sure."

"What if we set a trap? She could testify on behalf of Elliot and clear him. Then we could set up a sting and let Thompson come for her. We would be waiting there to capture him."

"The press would have a heyday with that! Let's face it, Liv. This girl, _if_ she exists, just might be better off staying hidden wherever she is."

"Yeah, maybe," Olivia agreed not feeling any better about her decision.

"So, you never did tell me why Elliot has you hidden away here. And why you are so paranoid someone is gonna figure out where you are. Does it have something to do with another case?"

"Yeah, something like that. We, uhhh, were helping out narcotics with a sting and we think they made me. I am supposed to lay low for a little while until they find the mob guy we were trying to help take down," Olivia lied to the best of her ability.

"That sucks! What a time for Elliot to get tangled up in this mess, huh? Did they make him, too?"

"No! Just me. Anyway, no one knows where I am. Not Cragen, not anybody. Well, just you and El. Even the manager downstairs doesn't know me by my real name. And we have to keep it that way, okay Case?"

"Of course. I would never do anything that would endanger your life, Olivia."

"I know. It is just very important that you make sure you are not followed when you come here again."

"Again? No, no. I was instructed to stay here with you until Elliot returned."

"Casey, I can't go to court. He needs you there more than I need you here tomorrow. Go and come back here and tell me what happens. If they don't release him, you are my only link to the outside world. Please help me."

"Okay, okay. I'll do it. But when Elliot goes all crazy about this I am so pointing him in your direction!"

Olivia smiled.

"Thank you, Casey."

Casey smiled back.

"You're welcome. And you owe me! Now where is that room service menu? I think we should order some junk food and stay up all night watching pay per view! It will be like a slumber party!"

Olivia laughed.


	8. 8 Guilty Until Proven Innocent

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Eight: Guilty Until Proven Innocent)_

Elliot waited patiently for his department appointed attorney to arrive. He sat alone at a table in the front of the courtroom and watched the double doors nervously. His fate now laid in the hands of some schmuck who was barely out of law school.

The room was a buzz with the whispers of everyone who came to see the sex detective who was accused of rape. He looked around the room at the faces of strangers, wondering which ones thought he was guilty and who believed in his innocence.

"We are ready to begin, Detective Stabler. Where is your attorney?" the judge's voice boomed from the front of the room.

"I'm not sure, your honor. I was to be provided an attorney by the department. I guess he is running late."

Elliot sat nervously and stared at the back of the room and a gangly young man burst through the large double doors. Every person in the room stared at the stranger as he fumbled with files and spilled the contents of his briefcase all over the floor as he made his way toward to the front of the room.

"You have got to be kidding me," Elliot mumbled with a smirk as he knelt to gather some of the stray papers.

"Thank you…." the man said tucking them back into his briefcase.

"Detective Elliot Stabler, I believe I am your client."

"Elliot Sta….yes," the man replied pushing his Buddy Holly glasses up the bridge of his nose as he extended his hand to shake Elliot's. "It's nice to meet you."

"The pleasure's all mine," Elliot said as the man stood to brush off his Bargain Basement suit. "Listen, do you think you can take care of this," Elliot asked looking over his shoulder as the judge stared at them.

"I just got the case this morning, so I am not really familiar with the details. I am going to ask for a continuance."

"Are we ready to proceed?" the judge asked leaning forward to stare them down.

"Yes, your honor," Elliot answered when his attorney didn't reply.

Casey hung up her cell phone as Olivia stepped out of the bathroom towel drying her hair.

"Is everything okay?" Liv asked.

"Yeah. Elliot met with his lawyer this morning and the case was continued so they have more time to prepare."

"So Elliot is being released?"

"Not exactly," Casey said as she cleared her throat. She drew a deep breath and exhaled. "Apparently, there was an _episode _in the courtroom."

"Oh, Elliot, no."

"Yeah. I guess he wasn't happy with the fact that his court appointed lawyer didn't seem to know what he was doing. Elliot spoke out in court, this judge is kind of a hard ass."

"And Elliot is bull headed," Olivia added as she exhaled.

"The judge slapped him with contempt and ordered him to spend the weekend in jail," Casey said as she picked up her jacket.

"You're leaving?"

"I am gonna go see what I can do to try to get that partner of yours out of trouble."

"Thanks Case," Olivia replied giving her a tired smile.

"I'll be back in a few hours and we'll order some dinner from that amazing room service menu."

Olivia settled on the sofa as she flipped through the channels on the television. She exhaled and stood up as she began pacing around the room trying to imagine everything that Elliot must be going through at this moment. She stood on the balcony for a little while just watching the city buzz around below her. Not knowing what was going on with him was driving her crazy and she had to do something about it. She pulled her hair up and tucked it under a hat, slipped on a jacket and some dark glasses and was on her way.

Elliot laid on his back of the cell reading the graffiti on the empty bunk above him. He listened as footsteps made their way down the concrete walk and stopped in front of the barred door of his cage.

"Stabler, you have a visitor!" the man announced.

"A visitor?" he asked standing as the man cuffed him and opened the door.

"She said she's your sister."

"I don't have a…." Elliot began as the man lead him out into a little booth with a glass window and a telephone. "Liv?"

"You've got ten minutes," the man reminded him as Elliot picked up the receiver.

"Olivia, what the Hell are you doing here?"

"I had to see you," she whispered pulling off the hat and allowing her long dark hair to fall around her shoulders. "You don't belong here. This is all my fault," she whispered placing her palm against the glass as he placed his against it on his side.

"None of this is your fault. This is just a big mix up and it will all be cleared up on Monday."

She watched as Elliot smiled and it broke her heart.

"It isn't that bad," he replied. "They were kind enough to give me my own cell. It's a lot like my first apartment….cozy, I believe is how they described it," he joked as she began to smile. "It's like a vacation. I sit around all day and I have been catching up on my reading."

"Reading?"

"Yeah, I have found some very colorful work by a man named Dash. He has a little trouble with spelling and uses poor grammar, but has shows some talent in writing poetry."

"Elliot…."

"Don't worry about me. How are you doing?"

"I'm fine."

"You shouldn't be here. We talked about the risk."

"I called around and no one would tell me anything. I had to know you were okay."

"Where is Casey? She is supposed to be waiting with you."

"She went to talk to some people and see if she could help you out of this mess."

"Liv, are you sure you weren't…."

"I wasn't followed. I took four different cabs and rode around for over an hour before I came here."

Elliot stared into her eyes.

"Olivia, how are you doing….really?"

He could see tears welling in her eyes and it killed him not to be there to protect her when she needed him the most.

"I'll be okay. I'm scared for you. I miss you."

"I miss you too, sweetheart. Go back to the hotel and lay low. You'll be safe there. Casey will work this out. I trust her, Liv. She is on our side."

"I'm going crazy just sitting around."

"I know, but right now the most important thing is keeping you safe. I have Munch and Fin trying to track this guy down. Casey is trying to help me out, right now we just have to be patient and wait."

"Okay," she said nodding in agreement.

"Time's up, Stabler!" the guard called from behind him.

Elliot looked over his shoulder at the man, then returned his attention to his best friend on the other side of the glass.

"Hey," he said as she raised her big brown eyes to look at him, "this will all work out. I promise."

"Yeah," she sighed.

"I love you Liv," he reminded her wishing so bad that he could just hug her tight and hold her until she felt safe once more.

"I love you too," she replied watching as he hung up the phone.

She sat and watched as the guard cuffed Elliot and took him from the room once more. Olivia sat quietly for a moment, then twisted up her hair and put her hat back on.

Olivia was sitting on the sofa staring out the window when Casey returned.

"How did it go?" Olivia asked standing at attention.

"Not so good. That judge seems hell bent on keeping Elliot in jail until the trial."

Olivia looked disappointed.

"No luck at all, huh?"

"I'm sorry."

"You tried. I just know how hard this must be on Elliot. He says is isn't that bad, but he would never tell me if it was."

"You spoke to him?"

"Yeah, I sort of went to see him this afternoon."

"Liv, you are not supposed to leave this hotel room. I promised Elliot that I would make sure you were safe. Now I am not completely sure what is going on with you two, but I know Elliot enough to know that if he feels the need to hide you away like witness protection there is a damn good reason why. I can't keep that promise if you are out running around the city every time I step out the door."

"I had to see him Casey. I can't keep sitting here not knowing what is going on with him. You don't understand."

"Look, I know the two of you are close."

"He is the only family I have, Casey. I can't just leave him in there to rot. If it were me in there…."

"He would do anything for you," Casey said sitting down beside her on the arm of the sofa. "I'm sorry I snapped on you. But he is right, you know? Out there, that is where the bad guys are. And for whatever reason, Elliot thinks you should stay in here."

"I know. So what is your plan?"

"I did manage to get control over the case."

"I thought they wouldn't let you…."

"I had to call in a few favors. I tried to get a different judge, but that isn't going to happen. So I have the rest of the weekend to plan a bullet proof defense."

"How does it look?"

"Not good. This case is going down hill fast. With this many dead girls, a jury is going to want someone to pay for this."

"But Elliot didn't do this! He would never do anything like this!"

"I know that. But he is a cop, Liv. I'm afraid the jury will jump to convict him at the slightest notion he could possibly be guilty. As far as they are concerned he is guilty until proven innocent. So I really have my work cut out for me."


	9. 9 Witness

_**Sorry it has taken so long for me to update. Thank you all for being so patient and for checking it out. Hope everyone has a safe and happy Thanksgiving! Try not to go too crazy with the Black Friday shopping! LOL. ;o) **_

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Nine: Witness)_

Olivia sat at her desk staring at the blank computer screen in front of her. She had been back to work for a couple of days now but just couldn't seem to focus.

"Hey," she heard from behind her as Fin sat a Styrofoam cup down on the desk in front of her. "You know, those reports wont type themselves," he joked.

"Ha ha," she said with a smile.

"Seriously though, maybe you should take a little more time off."

Olivia looked up at him fighting back a look of fear.

"What are you….?"

Fin looked around the room then leaned in and spoke softly to her.

"I know you were sick and had to take a couple of days. I'm just saying it isn't a big deal if you feel like you need to take a few more. You look exhausted, and anyone who really knows you can probably tell you just have not been your usual self lately."

"Is that your _polite_ way of saying I look like shit, Fin?"

"Not at all. I'm just trying to look out for you."

"I can take care of myself."

"Maybe so. But Elliot asked me to look out for you. What kind of friend would I be if I didn't keep my promise to him?"

Olivia just stared at him.

"Liv, I know how hard this has all been on us….all of us, but especially you. He is your partner and your best friend." Fin paused for a moment as she began to cry. "We are doing everything we can possibly do to get Elliot out of jail. He has a lot of people backing him up and supporting him right now, people who have his back no matter what and we're not giving up on him."

"Yeah," she sighed as she wiped a tear from her cheek. "This shouldn't be happening, Fin. This is all wrong. Elliot doesn't belong in jail. He would never hurt anyone and now he is on trial for his freedom….for his life. He has been in jail for a week now and I just feel like I should be doing more to help him. But I am just sitting here trying to pretend that everything is okay. It's not okay."

Fin brushed his thumb over her cheek wiping away a tear as he hugged her.

"He has an amazing legal team and some pretty amazing friends," he said staring into her eyes hoping his pep talk would help ease her anxiety. "Casey has his back in the courtroom, she's really been looking out for him. She says this new lawyer is incredible and has never lost a case."

"Almost never loses a case," Olivia corrected him.

Fin forced a smiled and Olivia couldn't help but smile as well.

"I know you wish there was more that you could do, but you are doing everything that you can. Elliot knows that. And he knows that you would never give up on him."

"I'm just so worried about him."

"And he is worried about you. Casey said he asks about you when he sees her every day. He said something about some guy he thought was after you…."

Olivia pressed her lips together wanting so badly to tell her friend the truth, but remained silent.

"We have doubled patrol in Elliot's neighborhood. I know he's asked Casey to stay with you for a while at his apartment. You and your safety are his main concern right now. I don't know all of the story here Olivia, but I do know that Elliot is worried enough that when he found out you were coming back to work he asked me to look out for you and not to let you out of my sight. Are you in some kind of trouble? You don't have to give me details if you don't want to, but…. How bad is this, Liv?"

"It's bad," she whispered refusing to look him in the eye. "I mean, it's not right now….but it could be."

"I kind of figured it was when Elliot decided to put you in hiding."

"Casey told you?"

"I made her tell me. When I heard you were sick I knew you had to be really sick, you never call into work. Then when Elliot was arrested I wanted to make sure you were okay. I went by your apartment with some flowers to check on you. When you weren't there I was worried. I asked Casey about you and she held out as long as she could. She's worried too."

"I am going to be fine."

"You know if you need anything, someone to talk to or…..anything…. I am here."

"Yeah. I know," she replied with a soft smile.

"And you can call me anytime. I am actually a pretty good listener."

"I will, I promise. And thanks for the coffee."

"Coffee?" he asked with a smile. "It's tea. Chamomile with honey."

"My favorite," she said with a smile.

"I thought it might help you feel better."

"You're an amazing friend, Fin."

That evening in an attempt at a little relaxation Olivia bought some beer and pizza.

"I don't know why you make me watch this stuff," Casey protested as she sat down with her beer on the sofa. "I don't understand a bit of what is going on."

"I didn't follow baseball either until Elliot explained it to me. Now I love the Yankees."

"Go Yankees!" Casey said with fake enthusiasm.

"Case, you could at least try. It isn't that complicated, you might actually learn to like it once you figure out what is going on."

"I'll tell you what I do like is the pitcher in those tight pants," she said with a smile as she pointed at the television. "He is hot!"

"I told you, you'd like it!" Olivia said with a smile.

After the game they sat around trying not to discuss Elliot's case.

"How is he doing, Casey?"

"He's hanging in there. He asks me about you every day."

"I should visit him again."

"You shouldn't. I know you want to, but you know how big a risk that is. You are lucky he agreed to let you go back to work."

"You talk about him like he is my father. Like I can't make a move without his approval."

"He is only trying to look out for you."

"I know. But I am not completely helpless. I mean, I sit here listening to everyone else talking about what is best for me. It's beginning to make me crazy!"

"I know. I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry. Just be honest with me. How is he, Casey?"

"He's scared. He tries to be strong and plays the tough guy, but who wouldn't be scared in his situation. A group of strangers is about to make a decision that for better or worse will effect the rest of his life. I would be terrified."

"How is the case going?"

"You know I can't discuss the details with you."

"Please Case, you are the only way I have to keep up with this. Do you think he has a chance at beating this?"

Casey sat silent for a few moments biting her lower lip then took a sip from her beer bottle.

"It doesn't look too good. The defense doesn't have much of anything to prove he wasn't involved. There isn't much evidence on the prosecution side either, but what they do have places a cop at the scene of a horrific crime. This jury is going to want someone to pay for murdering those women. The prosecutor keeps putting on this big song and dance and it is all an illusion to distract from the fact that the fate of this case rests on one tiny finger print."

"You don't think the jury will buy it, do you?"

"I hope not. But I have seen cases sealed with less promising evidence."

The next day, Olivia donned yet another disguise as she slipped into the back row in the courtroom. The suspense was killing her and she had to find out for herself how the trial was going.

"Casey was right," she whispered as yet another day seemed to have been wasted and her partner was lead away once more in handcuffs back to his holding cell.

That night she laid sleepless in Elliot's bed staring out the window at the city lights. She knew exactly what she had to do.

The following afternoon, Elliot sat at a table in the front of the room surrounded by his lawyers. Under his cool and calm exterior, he was scared to death. He listened as attorneys took turns speaking to the jury and presenting evidence. After breaking for lunch everyone settled back into their seats. Just then a message was brought forward from the back of the room.

"Excuse me, your honor, may I approach the bench?" A man in an Armani suit asked.

Elliot watched as the judge motioned for him to come forward and the man leaned over and whispered something to Casey.

"What's going on?" Elliot whispered, watching as the lead defense and prosecuting attorneys spoke with the judge.

"It seems we have just been provided with some new evidence."

"What evidence?"

Elliot returned his attention to the front of the room as the judge announced that court would resume the following morning after the new evidence had been considered. The watched as people began to exit the courtroom.

"What evidence?" Elliot asked Casey once more.

"DNA evidence," Casey replied still not quite sure herself what was going on. "And a witness," she mumbled reading over the crumpled piece of yellow paper the message had been written on.

"DNA? How did they get DNA? None of the rape kits turned up positive for semen."

"One of them did," a soft and familiar voice said from behind him.

Casey and Elliot turned to see Olivia walking toward them. Elliot stared into her eyes, realizing exactly what she had done.


	10. 10 Safe With You

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Ten: Safe With You)_

Olivia held her breath as she waited for some sign that her partner was going to make it out of this mess in one piece. Inside, Casey and the other attorneys were discussing the details of Elliot's fate.

Olivia drew a deep breath as she turned her attention to a small red bird as it landed on a bush just outside the window. She made her way to the window and pressed her palm against the glass. Outside the little cardinal chirped a sweet song as if calling to his mate.

Suddenly a loud booming sound echoed from behind her as the doors of the courtroom were thrown open. Startled, the little bird flew away, disappearing into the hustle and bustle of the city.

"How did it go?" Olivia asked studying Casey for a response.

"We have to get downstairs," Casey replied.

"The basement? What's in the basement?"

Casey smiled a quirky smile.

"Your partner," she replied. "He's being released on his own recognizance while we get things in order for the trial."

Olivia smiled.

"You're amazing!"

"Liv, do you understand what this means?"

"Elliot is coming home."

"It means they are going to put you on the stand. I tried to argue a way out of it, but the judge thinks the jury needs to hear your testimony. Are you ready for that?"

"I am ready to get Elliot out of this horrible place," Olivia replied as she stepped out of the elevator and made her way down a seemingly empty hallway.

"Are you even listening to me?" Casey asked.

"I hear you. I would just rather not discuss this right now."

"We are going to have to discuss it eventually," Casey replied pointing to a door at the end of the hall.

"Elliot is in the parking garage?" Olivia asked.

"Fin is meeting us with the car. I thought with all of the publicity this case has drawn, it might be safer….and easier to leave this way, avoiding the media camped out front."

"Good call," Olivia agreed.

Moments later Elliot was escorted into the parking garage by another attorney.

"El," Olivia sighed fighting back tears of relief as her partner gained his first taste of freedom in over a week. "Oh my God, are you okay?"

"I'm alright," he replied hugging her tightly in his arms. "Man, are you a sight for sore eyes! How are you?"

"I'm okay. Better now that you're out of jail."

"Temporarily out of jail," Casey reminded them. "I was just explaining to Olivia the terms under which the judge has allowed us to proceed."

"What terms?" Elliot asked as they climbed into the back of an unmarked police car and Fin drove them toward Elliot's apartment. "I could barely follow the conversation in there with all of the legal jargon."

"They want you to tell your story in front of that room full of people," Casey said looking at Olivia. "The judge is going to put you on the stand and expect you to explain to the jury the details of your attack and how exactly you know it was not Elliot who attacked you."

"That is stupid," Elliot argued, "they already have the DNA from the rape kit. Why does he need to put her on the stand?"

"This is a big case, Elliot. Huge."

"And it's an Election year," he added.

"Maybe so, but he has the right to play that card and he has. We have no choice. If she doesn't take the stand you go back to jail until the end of the trial."

"I can handle that. If it keeps her off the stand, that's what I'll do."

"Elliot, no," Olivia argued.

"Liv," he said looking at her, "they are going to make you say things in there. Bad things. In front of all of those people. They are going to make you relive every horrible thing that bastard did to you, in front of a room full of strangers. It isn't worth it."

"It is to me. You are innocent. I know that. And I will do whatever I can to keep you from going down for a crime you didn't commit."

"Even if it meant causing yourself more pain?"

"Elliot, we spend our lives trying to convince victims that testifying against their attackers is the best way to get justice. We help them to find the courage to walk into that room and do exactly what I am expected to do right now. It is never easy on them….it's hell, but they do it."

"Some of them do," he replied.

"What kind of person would I be if I didn't do the same thing I ask them to do every day? And what kind of justice is served if they just toss an innocent man in prison for the crimes and quit searching for the real killer? He is out there, Elliot! I know he is. I feel him. He is still out there and he is just going to move on and do this to someone else, unless we find him and we stop him. I know that you would never hurt me," she said as a single tear slid down her cheek. "I know without a doubt that you are not the man who attacked me. And I need you to help me find him."

"Liv, I'm not going to give up until this prick pays for what he's done. I promise you that."

"Can we please talk about this later? I'm just glad that you are out of jail."

"Yeah, we can talk about it later. But sooner or later…..we are going to have to discuss it."

Olivia forced a smile as she shifted her attention out the car window.

Back at Elliot's apartment Olivia chopped vegetables for dinner as he enjoyed a long hot shower.

"That smells wonderful," he said as he entered the kitchen. "But you know we could have just ordered a pizza and got some beer."

"I've got beer," she replied. "I thought you might enjoy a home cooked meal."

"Always," he said taking a seat on the other side of the counter and watching as she tossed the vegetables into a bowl.

"I've got fried chicken, mashed potatoes, corn and salad."

"Oh my gosh! Are those real potatoes?"

"Yes, I mashed them myself," she replied with a proud smile.

"Domestic Goddess! When did you learn how to cook?"

"I've always known how. I just never really get the chance. This has been my form of therapeutic expression since you've been gone."

"Oh yeah? You've been cooking a lot?"

"Baking mostly," she replied opening the pantry to reveal several plastic containers of homemade treats. "Cookies, brownies, pies…..I have practically driven Casey crazy."

"Pie?"

Olivia smiled.

"Apple. For dessert. A la mode," she added.

"You make ice cream, too?"

"No," she laughed. "I bought that….. French vanilla."

"My favorite!"

"I know," she replied handing him a plate of food. "It is so good to have you back."

"It's good to be back."

That evening Elliot laid on the couch staring up at the ceiling as he tried to fall asleep. Down the hall, Olivia stirred restlessly in his bed. She raised up as she heard a light tap on the door.

"Liv….are you asleep?"

"No," she whispered softly. "Come in."

She scooted over giving him room to lay beside her on the bed.

"Sometimes I have trouble falling asleep," she confessed.

"Do you still think about it?" he asked staring at the tears rising in her eyes.

"All the time," she whispered. "I try so hard to put it the past and move on. I know I wont be able to live a normal life again until I can do that. But somehow, it is always there in the back of my mind and it just wont go away. I pass strangers on the street, Elliot, and I swear I see his face."

"I thought you didn't see him."

"It was dark. I only caught a glimpse in the side mirror when he slammed me against the car. But I know who he is. I am positive, Elliot. There is no doubt in my mind it was Lyle Thompson's face I saw in that mirror. It's like he's haunting me….hunting me."

"He very well could be. We will find him. And when we match his DNA to the sample from your kit, he is going to prison for the rest of his life."

Olivia smiled a warm smile.

"I don't think he's after me. Fin hasn't left my side without assigning some kind of guard. He's been really sweet. And Casey is probably glad to finally be able to sleep in her own bed tonight. They didn't even know what happened and they have been so supportive."

"But they know now. You sold yourself out to get me out of jail."

"It was inevitable, El. They were going to find out eventually. And the longer I held that secret inside, the bigger it became and the harder it was going to be to tell the truth about what happened. It was the right thing to do."

"I'm so sorry, Liv. I would do anything to protect you."

"And I would do anything to protect you. Even if it means coming forward with the biggest secret I have ever had in my life."

"And the one time you really needed me, I wasn't there."

"You're here now. That's what's important."

"It's been a long day. I should go and let you get some sleep."

"Don't go. Stay here, sleep by me."

Elliot smiled as he stared into her tired eyes. Olivia had always had a way of tugging at his heart strings.

"You sure I wont keep you awake all night?"

"No," she said with a soft yawn. "I feel safe when I'm with you."

"You are safe when you're with me."

Olivia smiled.

"Good night, El."

"Good night, Liv."

Elliot pulled the blankets up around her and watched protectively over her as she drifted off to sleep.


	11. 11 The Cold Hard Truth

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Eleven: The Cold Hard Truth)_

The night air was thick and a small fan on the dresser across the room blew just enough breeze to ruffle the curtains as it oscillated. Through the partially opened window Elliot could hear the sounds of the busy city on the streets below. The smell of rain and her sweet perfume surrounded him.

He rolled to face Olivia, still unsure of what had woke him from his heavy sleep. He smiled as he watched her resting peacefully and focused his attention on a small lock of her dark hair that rustled ever so slightly as the fan blew across them once more.

He had always been close to her. They shared a bond like no other pair of detectives at the SVU, they had often finished each other's sentences and had full conversations in a mere glance with no words at all. He was protective of her. Over protective maybe. Quite the way a father would be with his child.

But he wasn't fatherly at all to her. More of an older brother, maybe. Partner and best friend. She was the most attractive woman he had ever seen, with her dark hair and exotic eyes. Her beautiful smile and a laugh that always seemed to make him smile. True she had an amazing body no man could help but notice, but his feelings for her had never been sexual. He appreciated her, he adored her, he respected her and made damn sure every man around her did as well.

Olivia had a rough life growing up. The adult child of an alcoholic, she was often still haunted by the ghosts of her past. She learned at a very early age that her relationship with her mother wasn't like that of other children and their parents. All too often it was Olivia who hailed the responsibility in the relationship, not only fending for herself, but caring for her mother as well.

Many lessons had been learned from this upbringing, not all of them good. She'd learned in childhood that even the most important people in her life could not fully be depended. The wounds were deep. Wounds that had healed, the best they could but left her emotionally scarred for life. And it wasn't until she took her place in her family here, at the Special Victim's Unit, that she was finally able to begin to trust again. Now, so many years later, there was only one person that she fully trusted no matter what….and Elliot was proud to be that friend.

Elliot drew a deep breath and stared at the clock for a moment. If he went to sleep in the next five minutes and skipped the morning shower, he could sleep….two hours and twenty seven minutes before he had to get up to get ready for work. He groaned and smoothed his hands over his face. Normally he had not trouble sleeping at night, but tonight his mind was racing with thousands of random thoughts and he didn't seem to be able to control them. Reaching behind his head, Elliot pulled out his pillow and laid it over his face.

Forty five minutes later…..

Olivia shot up from the bed with tears streaming down both sides of her face. She panted and gasped for air as she tried to remember where she was and what was going on.

"Liv?" Elliot asked sitting up. "Are you alright?"

She looked at him and he could see the fear in her eyes.

"Sweetheart, com here," he whispered tucking a wavy strand of sweat soaked hair behind her ear as he pulled her into his arms as she trembled and broke down crying. "Hey," he whispered staring into her eyes, "it was just a dream. It was all a bad dream. But you are safe here."

"I'm sorry," she gasped trying to catch her breath and calm down.

"You don't have anything to be sorry about. You are going through a hard time right now," he said in a soft and comforting voice as he laid back down on the bed and just held her for a moment. "It's okay to be afraid, Liv. And I am here if you want to talk about it."

"I don't understand why this is still bothering me," she said as she wiped away her tears with the back of her hand. "We have talked about it before. I have already told you everything that happened."

"Maybe you should talk to someone else."

"You think I need therapy?"

"No. I just mean if you think that is something that will help you feel better, it doesn't hurt to go talk to someone."

"What is wrong with me, El? I really thought I was moving forward. Things seemed so much better since you got out of jail and now….now I am starting in on the dreams again."

"Maybe it is because of the court date coming up. Maybe this is stirring up a lot of things that you thought had settled and it is causing these dreams again. And it doesn't help that your attacker is still out there somewhere and no one can find him. Maybe it is just a lot of things that have been all built up inside and they are trying to find a way out."

"You're probably right."

"I'm always right," he joked and she laughed. "Seriously though, I wish I knew some way to make all of this easier on you."

"You do, El. Just having you here with me and knowing and feeling that I am safe with you helps more than anything. You are the only thing that has kept me sane."

"Are you nervous about court tomorrow?"

"I didn't think I was."

"You don't have to do this, you know?"

"El, I need to do this. For me and for you. I can't just stand by and let you go to prison for something you do while the real criminal is still running around out there somewhere."

"Are you sure about this? You know if you go to court with this things are liable to get a lot harder before they get easier."

"And if I don't go to court things are going to get a lot harder for us both and they will just stay that way. You're my best friend, El. I wont leave you in prison to rot."

Elliot hugged her tight.

"You should try to get some rest," Elliot said raising his arm as she laid her head against his chest.

"I love you, El," she whispered softly.

Elliot smiled.

"I love you too, honey," he replied kissing the top of her head.

She was sitting on the sofa drinking a cup of coffee when he woke up the next morning. Olivia didn't say too much before court and Elliot could tell she had a lot on her mind. After a quick cup of coffee, he drove them to the courthouse.

"Are you okay?" he asked as he opened the car door for her and she stepped out.

"I'm good," she replied forcing a smile and he knew she was nervous as hell.

"Casey said to park around back and she would have someone back here to let us in. This way we can avoid the media circus out front."

Olivia nodded and pressed her lips together nervously. Elliot placed his palm against the small of her back and lead her toward the entrance. Inside Elliot paced the floor waiting for things to get started.

"Are you sure about this?" Casey asked as Olivia fidgeted with the strap on her shoe.

"Of course she's not sure," Elliot replied as Olivia shifted her eyes upward to meet his. "This is insane! Liv, you can't do this. There has to be another way."

"Elliot, unless another witness comes forward in the next three minutes, I am afraid there is no other way," Casey corrected him.

"Well find one!" he growled.

"Elliot," Olivia said as she stood and smoothed the wrinkles out of her dress, "I can do this."

"You shouldn't even be here."

"Did you just expect me to leave you in there?"

"Liv….it isn't worth it," Elliot said as he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and stared into her eyes.

"You heard Casey. They are ready to hang you for this. There is no other way. Elliot, I know you didn't do this. And I can't let you go to prison for something you would never do."

"You should go," Casey said with a nod as Elliot's lawyer stepped out of the courtroom and motioned for him. "I will stay right here with Liv."

"Alright," he said smiling at Olivia. "Just remember to breathe."

Olivia nodded.

"And it isn't too late to change your mind. I'll understand."

She smiled.

"Elliot, I am not going to change my mind. It doesn't matter how hard this is to face, it is the right thing to do."

Elliot closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to hers. He took a deep breath and gazed into her eyes as she smiled at him.

"I will meet you right here when we're finished in there," Elliot said as he kissed her forehead.

"I'll be here," she said softly.

"Take care of her, Case."

Inside, Olivia took the stand. She sat down and looked around the room at all of the people staring at her. At a table in the front of the room, Elliot sat beside his lawyer. And two rows behind him sat Casey watching as things began to unravel.

Elliot held his breath as the questioning began. They asked Olivia all kinds of personal questions, requesting she provide details that no one else should have the right to know. They wanted details about her dating life and sexual relationships before she was attacked and the way they kept prodding into her personal life was really starting to piss him off.

But Olivia didn't let it bother her. She sat tall and answered every question they had to the best of her ability. Then came the questions about the night she was attacked. What was she doing? Had she been drinking? How much had she been drinking? Elliot stirred in his seat, getting more and more frustrated by the way they made it seem as if she were the one on trial. But again, Olivia told them everything they needed to know.

Olivia held her breath and stared at him for a moment with tears in her eyes. She had already discussed things with Elliot and he had seen the case file with all of the gory little details. But for some reason now if bothered her to have to retell this story detail for detail in front of her best friend.

She closed her eyes and drew a deep breath as her lawyer handed her a glass of water. Olivia cleared her throat and apologized as she composed herself once more.

"Do you need to take a break?" the judge asked looking at her.

"No, your honor. I'm okay. I'd really like to continue if that is alright with you," Olivia replied.

"Alright, then. Please continue."

Elliot watched as she pressed her lips together once more, then began to tell the story of her attack. He shook his head as the cross examiner asked her about the intimate details of her attack, forcing her to relive the entire event in front of a room full of people.

The man spoke to her in a tone of disbelief and it angered, Elliot. He listened as the man asked Olivia if she had seen the face of the man who attacked her that night. Olivia drew a deep breath and looked down for a moment before closing her eyes.

She tried hard for the first time forcing herself to remember every detail she could of her attack. Elliot shifted in his seat as he watched the tears begin to flow from her eyes.

It all came rushing back to her. Little clashes running through her mind, like a slide show of the worst night of her life. Every second, every painful moment as fresh and new in her mind as if it had happened yesterday.

She opened her eyes once more and stared directly at Elliot for a second before she cleared her throat and softly began to speak. She began to explain that she had seen the face of her attacker only for a moment in the side mirror on the car as he was raping her and the man who attacked her was not Elliot.

The lawyer paced the floor spouting words of doubt to the crowd, trying hard to discredit her testimony. He stopped still in front of Olivia and stared her down for a moment before returning to the table where his assistant sat and picked up a copy of the original police report.

"Can you identify this document, Ms. Benson?"

"That is the police report I filed the night I was raped."

The man turned and held it up in front of room of strangers.

"I am a bit confused," he said laying the paper in front of her. "Doesn't it state right here in the highlighted passage, that you _did not _infact see the face of the man who attacked you?"

"Yes," she said softly.

"I'm sorry. I am having a little trouble hearing you."

Olivia cleared her throat and leaned forward into the microphone.

"Yes," she repeated.

"And now you are stating, under oath, may I remind you, that you did infact see the face of the man who raped you?"

"Yes," she repeated.

"Well, which is it? Did you see his face or not?"

"I _did_ see his face. But it was only for a moment."

"Can you explain why you reported this false information?"

"While the man was raping me, I saw his face only for a moment in the side mirror on the car. I must have blocked it out. I didn't remember it until just now."

"How covenant," he scoffed as he turned and walked to toss the paper back on the table. "Are there any other details you have _just remembered?_"

"No."

"Any other information that you have falsely reported?"

"No, sir. I saw the face of the man who attacked me and I know it was not Elliot Stabler."

"And how do you know that? It was dark. And you said yourself you only saw him for a moment."

"Because the man who attacked me was taller. He smelled like beer and stale cigars…..and…."

"And?" the man barked demanding a better explanation.

"I have known Elliot for years. He is my partner and my best friend in the world. And I know him well enough to know that he would never hurt me," she said clearly in a loud voice as she wiped away her tears and stared directly at Elliot across the room.

The next few minutes seemed to take forever. But when everything was said and done, the judge ruled that all of the charges filed against Elliot were formally dropped.

After court Olivia walked out into the hall to find Elliot standing right where he promised her he would be waiting for her. She smiled through tear filled eyes and made her way to him. Olivia threw her arms around his neck and buried her face in his chest. Elliot hugged her tight and just held her for a few minutes and let her fall apart in his arms.


	12. 12 Glow

_**Glow:**_

_**1) a happy feeling: **_a sense of happiness or well-being; _**2) to feel warm and contented: **_to feel a pleasant warm sensation owing to happiness, satisfaction, or love; _**3) light from something hot: **_a light produced by something that has been heated to a high temperature but is not in flames

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Twelve: Glow)_

It had been nearly four months since Elliot was cleared of all charges and the case against him was dropped. In that time Olivia had been seeing a counselor to help her cope with the traumatic events she had faced just a few short months before. She had also began volunteering as an advocate for other women who had suffered similar fate.

Elliot had watched her slowly begin to heal. Of course, she was a long way from being her old self again, but she was well on her way down the path that would lead her there. But it was good to look into the fragile shell of a person she had become since the attack and see that the fearless strength he recognized in his partner was infact still there.

Elliot sat in his car outside the church where her Tuesday afternoon group session was held waiting for it to conclude. He leaned forward to spit the shell of a sunflower seed out the window as the door on the passengers side of the vehicle opened.

"That could be considered littering, you know? And therefore punishable by law," Fin said taking a seat beside his friend.

"Have you come to arrest me?"

"Just trying to figure out what you're up to."

"Olivia has a meeting until two."

"You following her now? She'll kick your ass if she finds out you are here. You know that, don't you?"

"That's why she isn't going to find out," he replied discarding the remains of another seed out the window smirking at Fin.

"Hey, she wont hear it from me."

"I know she thinks she can handle this all on her own now. She is finding herself, her strength once again and I am all for that…."

"But? I feel a but coming on here."

"But that psychotic freak that attacked her is still out there somewhere. I let him hurt her once, Fin. I won't let it happen again. If that monster comes anywhere near her again I'll put a bullet between his eyes. There won't even be a trial."

"You are not the only one who wants to protect her. We all want to make sure she is safe, El. But she has asked us to stand down. And I can't blame her for trying to take her life back. Hiding out and constantly looking over your shoulder every step you take, that is no way to live. You know I saw her smile this morning. Just a little smirk at one of Munch's stupid jokes, but it's the closest I have seen her to happy since the day they released you from jail. She deserves to be happy."

"That's all I want, Fin. For her to feel happy and safe again."

"But how is she supposed to feel safe with someone shadowing her all of the time?" Fin asked as Elliot focused his attention on the red door of the church. "I know your heart is in the right place, man. But maybe it's time we all back off a bit and let her live."

"That's a bad idea. I can feel it. We back off and the moment we let our guard down that son of a bitch grabs her again. He'll kill her this time, Fin. You know he will."

"She's the only one who can put his ass in prison where he belongs."

"That is not a risk I am willing to take. He belongs in Hell," Elliot corrected him. "And I am not above sending him there myself. She is finally doing better, getting stronger every day. The last thing she needs is the trauma of having to testify at another trial, having to actually sit on the stand in the same room as that bastard and have to describe in detail again what that prick did to her."

"We all want what's best for her, man. But I honestly think maybe this time best means backing off just a bit and giving her a little room to breathe. You don't want her to go through life always feeling like there is someone walking behind her, do you? To always be afraid of turning around for fear of who or what might be back there? She is surviving, Elliot. Which is more than most people can do after being through half the shit she's been through. Maybe it isn't our place to ask more of her right now."

"I'm not pushing her, Fin. I'm not asking anything of her. I a merely trying to be supportive and help her to feel safe again. How did you know I was here, anyway?"

"Olivia called me from inside. She said she thought someone was following her while she was walking the four blocks to her meeting. She said she could feel someone watching her," Fin stared at Elliot waiting for him to realize exactly what was being implied.

"Is she okay?"

"She's fine. I told her I would check it out."

"Did you see anyone?"

Fin blinked.

"She's talking about you, fool."

"Ahh shit," Elliot said finally realizing what his friend was trying to say. "I was trying to help and I scared her."

"Maybe not scared…..spooked a bit. But she is fine, Elliot. That is my point. She knows to call one of us if she has any trouble. She is carrying mace, a tazer gun and a small, but perfectly legal knife I gave her. I feel sorry for any bastard who walks up behind her unannounced."

"You gave her a knife?"

"She needs to be able to defend herself. Brass has her on the desk and won't give her weapon back until she finishes a few more weeks of therapy and completes a psych eval. My point here is that you have to trust her. _We_ have to trust her so that she can learn to trust herself again."

"It isn't her that I don't trust. She's gone back to work and started sleeping back at her apartment, against my advice of course."

"I know man, but we have to let it go. It is her life, only she can know when she is ready to move forward."

"She still sleeps with the bathroom light on, Fin. When she sleeps at all, that is."

"You still camped out on her couch?"

"Of course. As long as she wants me there, I will be there. The nightmares seem to have calmed a bit. But sometimes I still hear her crying down the hall. It kills me. To lay there in the dark and listen to her, knowing she thinks I can't hear her. She gets so exhausted she will finally pass out. And when she does she comes to me, after one of her dreams, covered in cold sweat and shaking so hard I think she could have a heart attack. I'll raise up my blanket and she climbs under it and lays with me on the sofa. I pull her in against me and close my arms around her tight. She'll lock her fingers in mine and make me promise never to leave her alone. I hold her like a child and speak soft comforting words to her. I promise her again that we will catch this bastard and I will make him pay. She nestles her head in against my chest and eventually she calms enough to drift off to sleep for a few hours. That is the only time she sleeps."

"Poor, Olivia."

"She is trying, I'll give her that. But this tough girl, I'm all fixed stuff….it's an act, Fin. She'll never really be safe. She'll never really feel safe. Not until we catch that bastard and make him pay for what he did to her. She lives in fear that he will find her and kill her. She may not admit it out loud, but I can see it in her eyes every time she looks at me. So I won't back off, I won't stand down. Not until I have fulfilled the promise I make to her every night and that man it captured."

"Then I suggest you get better at surveillance," Fin said with a nod as Olivia crossed the street and headed for Elliot's car.

"What are you doing here?" she asked and judging by the look on her face she knew exactly what he was doing.

"I called him," Fin said taking the wrap and stepping in front of Elliot as he waited for her to freak out. "I thought he should be here in case we were able to take this guy down."

"Oh," she said shifting her attention to Fin. "Did you see anything?"

"Nothing," Elliot said clearing his throat. "And I circled the block three times."

"You did, huh?" she asked in disbelief looking at the scattering of sunflower seed remains on the ground near his car.

"Then I asked him to wait here to catch you and I took patrol," Fin offered up.

"Look, guys, I know you are worried. But I am fine. I got a little spooked, but it was nothing. And I probably wouldn't be so worried about someone following me if it wasn't true," she said rolling her eyes around to stare Elliot down.

"You're busted, dude."

"Thanks, Fin."

"Thank you both. I know you are only being so persistent because you care and I appreciate that. But I need some room to breathe or I am going to freaking go crazy."

"I'll give you room to breathe, but you have to work with us. All we want is to keep you safe," Elliot replied.

"And this is about the most dangerous thing you could do," Fin added.

"Look, I'll drive you anywhere you want to go. Any time, any place. I will drop you at the door and wait outside to take you home. You can go in alone and no one else will ever even know I am there, I swear."

"Or if you get sick of his ugly mug give me a call. I'll be there in a heartbeat, you know that. Please just don't be out walking around the city alone," Fin pleaded with her.

"You know for an only child I sure seem to have a lot of over protective older brothers."

"We only bug you 'cause we love you," Fin said with a sincere look and his version of her puppy dog eyes.

"That only works for me," she replied pointing at him and calling him out.

"Liv, please. Just a little while longer. We have a few leads and we could catch Thompson any day now."

"Okay," she replied softly. "But if you don't catch him soon I am going to go stir crazy," she replied walking to the passengers side of Elliot's car and opening the door. "You scared me nearly half to death, you know."

"That wasn't my intention at all."

"How did you think I was going to react when a car followed me half way across town?"

"I didn't realize you saw me."

"I didn't. I could feel you?" she questioned herself as the words came out. "It's hard to explain and I know it doesn't make any sense."

"It makes perfect sense. You have always had great instincts. Don't ignore them, they will keep you alive. Just promise me…"

"I promise," she said cutting him off. "I will call you or Fin. I get it," she said solemnly as he watched the sadness return to her eyes. Her moment of freedom was over now and the little white dove was returned to her cage.

"Hey," he said nudging her with his elbow, "I really am sorry I scared you. And I don't mean to make you feel trapped, I just want to know that you are safe. That's all."

"I know," she whispered softly as she stared out the window.

"Is there some way I can make it up to you?"

"Actually," she said turning in her seat to look at him, "there is something."

Elliot looked at her awaiting his fate.

"We need volunteers to help out in the soup kitchen. We were able to get the funds to do one big meal once a week, above the usual soup and sandwiches they usually serve. Since I am stuck behind a desk at work, I thought this would be a good way for me to give something back to the community. So I signed up."

"You what? You do realize that leaves you right out in the open, don't you? You are inviting people in off the streets. Thompson could be one of those people for all we know."

"Then I guess you will have to come, won't you?" she asked with a blink of her thick black lashes.

Elliot took a deep breath and exhaled. For a moment she wasn't certain he wasn't mad at her.

"Don't be angry. I guess I didn't really think about it that way until you pointed it out. These people really need our help, El."

"I'm not mad at you, Liv. I am worried for you. And your life is more important than serving food to a bunch of homeless people."

"Tell that to the children who try to go to sleep every night with empty bellies," she replied softly turning to stare out the window once more and he watched as a tear slid down her cheek.

Elliot smiled and shook his head.

"You find this amusing?" she asked.

"It's not that," he said smiling as he gazed into her eyes, "even on your worst day you put everyone else above yourself."

"Realize that I don't need your approval. Keep in mind that I am asking you out of sheer respect for the friend who I know only wants the best for me. I want this, Elliot. With all of my heart I want to do this. But I won't. Not if you don't want me to."

"Who am I to keep you from being you? You have a beautiful soul, Olivia and you never let any one or anything change that."

"Does that mean you'll help me?"

"Of course I will," he said and he couldn't help but smile when she did.

"Thank you," she gasped leaning over to hug him tightly.

"And you don't have to stay inside all the time, you know? You just have to be safe when you do go out. I'm up for a walk any time you want to get out and get some air. I don't mean to keep you cooped up."

"You don't have to worry about me," she said removing her jacket and tossing it onto the sofa in her living room. "I guess I got a little spooked while out on my big adventure this afternoon. I was going to catch a ride back with Fin until I saw you there."

"You have any idea what you want for dinner? I can cook or order out, my treat."

Olivia smiled.

"You don't have to wait on me hand and foot."

"I figure as long as I'm staying here I might as well make myself useful."

"I've been thinking about that, too."

Elliot watched as she combed her fingers through her hair and tried to find the words to say what was on her mind.

"It's been nearly four months, Elliot. And You have really helped me so much. I have enjoyed having you here," she gulped finding it hard to continue feeling as if she were letting him down. "Maybe I am the one who has been holding you captive. I've had you camped out on by sofa for months. I think maybe it's time I learn to face the night alone," she said with a shaky uncertainty.

"Are you sure?" he asked halfway hoping she'd let him stay and pretty sure if he did leave she wouldn't be the only one who wouldn't be able to find sleep.

"I think so. Yes. Go home," she said forcing a smile and forcing back tears. "It will be nice to sleep in your own bed again."

"My neck has been a little stiff," he said pretending to stretch out a crick. "What about you?"

She smiled a soft and tired smile.

"It's time I learn to face the world again. To live my life. I can't just give up because somewhere out there is a lunatic. This is New York City, everyone who lives here is a lunatic! My world isn't just going to return to normal on it's own, El. I have to make my own normal. And I think now is as good a time as any."

"Alright then," he said standing to go. "But you know if you need me for anything…."

"You are only a phone call away," she said cutting him off.

"I am number one on your speed dial," he corrected her.

Olivia laughed breaking the tension between them.

"Seriously though," he added, "any time, any hour, for any reason. I'll even come over to check for monsters under the bed if that's what you need."

"I know you will," she said with a smile and Elliot thought about how nice it was to see her smiling again.

"Thanks again," she said leaning in to hug him before he went.

She nestled her head in against him for a moment and closed her eyes tight, trying to find the courage to let him go. Elliot wrapped his arms around her for a moment and just held her there in the safety of his arms where she was protected from the world. Then he kissed the top of her head, not unlike he did with his own daughters before leaving them.

"I'm good," she reassured him as she pulled away. "Go and get some rest. We have a big day tomorrow," she reminded him breaking eye contact to brush a spot of lint from his jacket.

"Good night, Liv."

"Good night, El."

Back in his own apartment, Elliot settled on the sofa to watched the last of a football game on television and eat Chinese take out straight from the carton. Upon arriving home for the first time in months, it had occurred to him that he had no groceries and he was forced….or opted to order delivery.

A few hours later he stirred on the sofa, nearly cross eyed he was so tired, yet unable to sleep. He couldn't help but worry about his partner and best friend facing her nightmares all alone across town. He exhaled and shut off the television, then moved down the hall. He climbed into the shower and tried his best to wash away his worries.

Olivia's apartment was pretty much dead center between where he and Fin lived. Chances are between the adrenaline, the sirens and the flashing lights, one of them would reach her before anyone could do her harm. And she wasn't completely helpless on her own. He counted on these thoughts to bring him comfort as he shut the water off and wrapped a towel around his waist.

He patted the towel over his muscular chest and arms, then tossed it aside. He stepped into a pair of pajama pants, a practice he took up while living on Olivia's couch for months and abandon his usual habit of sleeping nude. Elliot plugged his phone into the charger on the nightstand beside the bed and pulled back the plain black comforter that covered it. There were no decorative patterns or throw pillows like in Olivia's bedroom.

He slid in between the sheets and pulled the blankets up around him. He laid still in the dark for several long moments refusing to open his eyes, but sleep refused him. It was too quiet, he thought reaching for the remote for the television, but settling for the controller for the fan instead. He checked the clock once more, five hours before he had to get up and head off to meet Olivia and help her cook for the homeless.

Elliot yawned and closed his eyes once more. Sleep was so close he could feel it tugging at him and hear it calling his name, but it was still just out of his reach. It was then he realized that he couldn't even remember the last time he'd slept in his own bed and that sleeping with her curled up safe with him had become just as much a comfort to him as it was to her.

He rolled over and picked up his phone just about to call and check on her when he caught himself. What if she was asleep? What if she was sleeping soundly and things were just fine, then he called her because he was worried and woke her? What if he were the reason she couldn't sleep tonight?

He exhaled and laid the phone back on the nightstand. Elliot snarled aloud as he covered his face with a pillow. He laid there stubbornly refusing to move as he, for the first time in his life actually attempted counting sheep.

Somewhere between thirty six and forty, a strange buzzing sound filled the room. Elliot raised his head and opened his eyes to see the phone lit up. He reached to pick it up and smiled when he read her name.

"_Are you asleep?"_ was the message she sent.

"That's my girl," Elliot said with a smile of relief as he fired off a one word response. _"Nope." _

He sat there in the darkness waiting anxiously for the next message to appear asking him to come back over and stay with her. But it never came. Nervously he fumbled with the phone to type out _"everything alri…"_

Just then his phone began to buzz a silent ring tone.

"Hey," he said trying desperately to hide the relief in his voice. "Is everything alright?"

"Yea," she sighed. "I'm sorry to call so late, I just…."

"Liv, don't apologize. You can call me any time you need to."

"I couldn't sleep," she whispered and he could tell she was as exhausted as he was.

"No? Did you try hot tea? Sometimes that helps."

"I had four cups of sleepy time tea. The problem isn't that I am not sleepy, I am. I just can't sleep."

"Just say the word," he said pausing waiting for her to ask him to return, but she didn't.

"Can you just talk to me for a while? Just until I'm ready to go to sleep?"

"Sure," he replied finding comfort in the fact that he was the one who could comfort her. "What do you want to talk about?"

"I don't know. Anything. Tell me a story."

"A story?"

"Yes, a bed time story. You have children, you've got to know a few. They help kids sleep, maybe they will help me."

"Okay. A story….lets see…."

Olivia sat patiently as Elliot tried to kick his groggy mind into gear and concoct a story for her.

"Okay, I've got something," he said clearing his throat. "Hey where did we…."

"El?" she said softly. "You are supposed to start with once upon a time."

Elliot smiled.

"This is a bit more non-traditional."

"Oh," she said and he could tell she was yawning. "Okay. Go on," she encouraged him.

"But just for you….Once upon a time," he began, "Hey where did we go, Days when the rains came, Down in the hollow, Playin' a new game," he almost whispered into the phone and Olivia chuckled softly. "Laughing and a running hey, hey, Skipping and a jumping, In the misty morning fog with, Our hearts a thumpin' and you, My brown eyed girl."

Olivia closed her heavy eyes and listened as he struggled not to sing the lyrics, but to speak them softly to her. "You my brown eyed girl. Whatever happened, To Tuesday and so slow, Going down the old mine, With a transistor radio. Standing in the sunlight laughing, Hiding behind a rainbow's wall, Slipping and sliding, All along the water fall, with you My brown eyed girl, You my brown eyed girl. Do you remember when we used to sing?" "Sha la la la la la la la la la la te da," she sang softly along with him.

"Elliot?"

"Yes?"

Olivia smiled into her pillow.

"No one's ever told me a bedtime story before."

Elliot smiled. It was heartbreaking to think of a mother who never read to her child, but calm and settling all the same to know that something this simple could calm her nerves. Nine parts woman, one part child, he thought to himself. Trapped somewhere inside that amazing woman was a frightened little girl. A little girl who he felt honored to know. This was a side that most people in her life never got the chance to see. This was the side that made him want to nurture and protect her always.

"Liv, I have a confession…"

She smiled.

"Go ahead," she encouraged him as a long silence hung on the line.

"I'm glad you called. Because….I couldn't sleep either."

"El," she breathed softly.

"Yes," he whispered.

"Finish the story," she said, her heavy eyes falling shut as she laid the phone beside her on the pillow and listened to him sing.

"Sha la la la la la la la la la la te da, So hard to find my way, Now that I'm all on my own. I saw you just the other day, My how you have grown, Cast my memory back there, Lord, Sometime I'm overcome thinking 'bout…." Elliot's voice cracked as he heard her soft sigh and knew she was almost asleep. "Making love in the green grass," he continued, "Behind the stadium with you, My brown eyed girl, You my brown eyed girl. Do you remember when we used to sing, Sha la la la la la la la la la la la la, la te da," he sang softly.

"Good night, Olivia," he whispered into he phone. "Sweet dreams," he said softly ad he pressed the end button and rolled over to lay the phone back on his night stand.

Elliot stretched and yawned as he settled in against his pillow and closed his eyes. Moments later he was asleep as well.

The next morning he was up with the sun and felt fully recharged. He took a hot shower and headed off to greet his partner. To his surprise no one answered when knocked on the door. Elliot smiled when he placed his key in the lock suddenly realizing she had the chain locked as well.

"Good girl," he mumbled aloud as he dialed her cell phone number.

"Benson," Olivia groaned from under her pillow.

"Good morning sunshine."

"Who is this?" she asked sitting up in the bed and scratching her head.

Elliot wrinkled his brow and stared at the phone.

"It's Harry Potter, what's your favorite scary movie? Who do you think it is?"

"Elliot?"

"Yes, Elliot," he said as she heard the knocking and opened the front door. "Who else would it be?"

"I don't know, I was asleep."

"Yea?"

"Yea," she replied with a yawn. "Yea," she repeated suddenly realizing she had slept…well…alone…all night.

"That's great. How did you sleep?"

"Like a baby. I was out like a light, once I was finally able to fall asleep. You are amazing, you know that?" she asked throwing her arms around his neck and hugging him.

"Wow all that for singing a song I didn't even write."

Olivia smiled.

"So what does breakfast get me?" he asked handing her a Starbucks cup and a bacon egg and cheese bagel from the deli loved on the corner.

She squealed with delight and placed a kiss on his cheek.

"You're the best! Just let me finish this and I'll jump in the shower. I won't be long, I promise."

"Sure," he said settling into his seat on her sofa and taking a sip from his four dollar cup of black coffee.

"So," he began clearing his throat, "this dinner we are helping cook for, how big are we talking here?" he listening as she disappeared down the hallway to get ready for the day.

"Big. They are planning to cook for close to a thousand people."

"Wow," he said suddenly realizing just what he had committed himself to. "What are we cooking?" moving to stand in the hall next to the door she'd left open part of the way so they could talk.

"I'm not completely sure," she said as he saw her walk past the door in a bath towel.

Elliot instinctively turned around to allow her more privacy. He listened to the sound of the water in the shower and could see the steam as it began to roll out the bathroom door and fill her bedroom.

"Last I heard they were planning on serving roast beef, mashed potatoes and homemade bread. We will be helping with the sides and desserts. Some members of the group went in early this morning to work on the main course. It will only take a few hours, if that's what you are worried about," she said stepping out into the bedroom once more in her towel.

This time Elliot didn't even realize he was watching her. She had her back to him and her dark wavy hair was twisted around and pinned up with a clip. He was mesmerized by the loose strands of hair and tiny little drops of water that trickled down her the back of her neck. She was, hands down, the most gorgeous woman he had ever seem in his life and she didn't even have to try.

He watched as the towel dropped to rest around her waist and he focused his attention on a constellation of small beauty marks that appeared on her back. He could see the curve of her breast as she reached forward picking up a sexy white lace bra embellished with little flowers and trimmed in a black sheer ruffle, beside it on the bed laid the matching string bikini underwear. Elliot blinked as she reached behind her and fastened the hooks, only then coming to his senses and remembering this was Olivia he was looking at.

He gulped hard as she picked up the underwear on the bed. He shouldn't be watching her, this was nine hundred kinds of wrong. But he couldn't seem to pull his eyes away from her. Every curve of her soft body glistened from the mist of the shower and he could almost feel the warmth of her golden skin. Olivia wearing the towel like a skirt stepped into the panties then patted her damp hair with the towel.

"Almost ready," she called not realizing he was watching as she turned and walked to the vanity and picked up a hair dryer.

She had long tan legs and sexy sculpted abs. The delicate curve of her breast was not too small, but not too large and she had just the right amount of ass.

"Dear God," he gulped blinking, reminding himself once more that this woman, God's most perfect creature, was like a sister to him.

Wobbly kneed and feeling quite guilty for watching her, Elliot stumbled back into the living room and tried his damnedest to forget what he'd seen. He sat with his eyes closed trying hard to think about the anything but her.

Sheep! He thought. Like the ones he'd attempted to count the night before. All fluffy and white….her bra was white….sheep! Sheep! Focus. Fluffy and….and….soft….her skin was soft. This he knew for certain, from all the times she had curled up next to him to sleep.

He stood there for a moment remembering how good it felt to hold her. To feel her there in his arms and know that she was safe and warm and with him. He closed his eyes and he could smell her sweet perfume. He had to stop this. He had to get control of himself. She may have been beautiful, but she was Olivia. She was his best friend and his partner and….incredible and hands down the sexiest woman alive.

He shook his head and rubbed his hands over his face. She needed him. She needed her friend. This was no time to activate the hormones and start thinking with his penis. Somehow all of these years he'd managed not to see her the way other men saw her.

Of course he knew she was a woman. And he knew she was pretty. But he had managed never to see past that. They shared a connection, a kindred spirit from the start and he couldn't imagine his world without her in it. He had often times found himself attracted to her, but it those feelings were usually sparked by a tender moment between them. A smile, a gaze into her beautiful brown eyes, or the touch of a hand. Until this point, he'd never seen her naked.

"Oh God, I saw Liv naked," he mumbled to himself.

"What's that?" she asked re-entering the living room wearing a soft pink sweater that made him think of cotton candy and a pair of jeans that looked tailored to fit her.

"You look nice," he choked out to try and cover the fact that he was staring.

"It's not too casual?"

Elliot couldn't speak, instead he shook his head.

"Good," she said with a smile.

"Am I driving or are you?" she asked with a pretty smile.

"Maybe you'd better drive," was all he could say.

"Sure, then you can finish your coffee," she replied.

"Right."

"You feeling alright?"

"Yes."

At this point the could only for one word sentences. Probably for the lack of oxygen to his brain.

In the car, Elliot stared out the window trying to think of anything but Olivia and the intoxicating scent of her perfume. As badly as he may have wanted to, he couldn't hit on her. Especially right now. After everything she had been through in the last few months the last thing she needed was to be hit on by one of the few men in the world she did trust.

At the church Elliot watched her as she climbed out of the car, she even made that look elegant.

"Are you sure you're okay?" she asked breaking his far off stare with her beautiful smile.

"I'm good. How about you?"

"Me, too."

Inside, Olivia introduced him to some of her friends from her therapy group, all of whom were survivors of violent attacks. This was like a second family to her now and he felt it important to attempt to get to know her new friends.

"So," she asked staring into him with those beautiful eyes, "do you want to peel potatoes or….be on pie duty?"

"I'm thinking potatoes," he said with a smile, relaxing as things between them began to return to normal. "I work a mean potato peeler."

Olivia smiled and laughed.

"This is Lily," Olivia said introducing him to a girl who appeared no more than fourteen years old.

"Hello, Lily."

"Hi," she said with a wave and a smile.

"Lily, this is my dearest friend, Elliot. And he has come to help us today. We were thinking maybe he could help you with peeling."

"Sure," the girl said with a friendly smile.

"Lily is in charge of the potatoes. You are in good hands, Elliot."

"Wait, where are you going?" he said with a smile.

"I have to go help make desserts." Elliot watched her as she walked away. "Thank you," she mouthed waving to him as she stepped from the room.

"So, Lily, what would you like me to do?"

"You can start here and work your way down the table," she girl said as Elliot looked up at the heaping mound of potatoes that covered the entire table.

"Okay, but this could take a while," he warned.

"We're not the only ones," she said with a playful laugh pointing over her shoulder as a group of women and children gathered at the other end of the table.

"I'll bet you and I could peel twice as many as they can. What do you bet?"

"There is more of them," she said studying the group as they began to work at a slow pace while chit chatting.

"But we can work faster. You ever peeled before?"

"I've been doing this for two years now."

"Well, I happen to be a peeling ninja. Oh yea, we've got this licked," he said with confidence as the girl smiled.

They got started as they made small talk. They talked about her school and his work. His favorite color and her favorite song. Then came the loaded questions as Lily began asking Elliot about his relationship with Olivia.

"We are just good friends," he tried to explain. "We've never dated, we've never even had…." Elliot paused remembering he was speaking to a fourteen year old.

"You've never what?" she asked blinking dark green eyes at him.

"Kissed," Elliot said hoping to fool the child.

"But do you want to kiss her?"

"Aren't you a bit young for this conversation?"

"I am a teenager. I have kissed boys, you know."

"Oh yea?"

She smiled with confidence.

"I'm not a child."

"I see. Did you kiss them with your mouth open?"

"Gross, no."

Elliot smiled and laughed.

"Is that how you want to kiss Olivia?"

"First of all, you said that, I didn't. And second of all….that is how grown-ups sometimes kiss each other. And it isn't gross, it's nice. If you are grown and kissing the right person."

"Like how grown?" she asked focusing her green gaze on him.

"Thirty," Elliot answered confident it was an answer he would be comfortable if someone gave it to his child. "And only if you are in love with someone."

"Oh. Do you love Olivia?"

"Yes. I do. But that is different from being _in love_."

"How is it different."

"I don't know exactly how to explain it. It's something you understand the more you feel."

"So if you don't know what being in love is like until you are in love, then how do you know that you are really in love when you're in love?"

"What?" Elliot asked getting lost in the teenaged confusion of the situation.

"And how do you know if the other person is really in love with you and doesn't just love you for that matter? And when a guy says he loves you, does he really mean he loves you or does that mean he is in love with you?"

She blinked awaiting an answer from her new found friend.

"That is a question that would probably be better answered by Liv. She knows more about girls and their emotions than I do."

He watched thankfully as she girl shrugged her shoulders and picked up the next potato.

"So you and Liv are friends?" Elliot asked trying not to make her feel as if he was completely avoiding conversation.

"Yea. Kinda. She's cool. We met in group."

Elliot's breath caught in his throat, suddenly realizing that this child had been the victim of a violent crime.

"She's really nice," the girl continued. "She's really helped out me and my mom."

"That sounds like Liv. She likes to help people."

"She's good at it. Making people feel better when they feel like there is no hope. She has helped turn things around for a lot of people here. And she got a lot of sponsors for this program, she's the main reason we are able to do this once a month."

"Let me ask you something. In your groups, do you talk about the bad things that other people did to you?"

"Some people do. We can share as much or as little about our situation as we feel like sharing. But a lot of people feel safe here, they can trust our group and they feel like they can open up to us….we can open up to each other."

"Does Olivia open up to your group?"

"Liv talks a lot, to a lot of people. She really helps them. And she's good at listening, too."

"So she is able to talk about things?"

"I can't tell you what she talks about. It's private. Just between members of the group."

"I just want to make sure someone is helping her."

"She listens mostly, to other people's problems. And when she does talk it isn't usually about the man who attacked her. Maybe that is what she talks about in private sessions. For a lot of people it is too painful to talk about in front of a group of strangers. But I can tell you that she talks about you."

"Me?"

The girl smiled.

"Yes. And the other friends she works with. She said you are her rock. That you are her best friend and someone she can trust when there is no one else. She really appreciates you. I think she likes you, too."

Elliot caught a stupid grin of flattery as it crossed his face.

"What makes you think that?"

"She can be almost in tears, but the moment your name comes up it brings a smile to her face."

"Well, some friends are that close."

"I think she likes you as more than just a friend."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because," she pointed out as he raised his head to see Olivia smiling at him from across the large room, "I only smile like that when I am around a guy I really like. Someone I think is hot."

Elliot chuckled for a moment before catching himself staring at Olivia like a love sick Romeo. Though it would greatly complicate things between them, part of him really hoped this kid knew what she was talking about. He cleared his throat and looked down to see Lily staring up at him with a grin that said he had just been caught.

"I am fourteen, I am not blind," she clarified.

"Even if it were true, which I am not saying it is….but even if it were…." he trailed off again for a moment mesmerized at the sight of his best friend once more. How was it that up until this morning he he'd been completely blind to the full extent of her beauty.

"If it were…." Lily continued.

"She's been through so much. To make a move on her now would be….it would be…."

"Bad timing?"

"The ultimate form of betrayal. I could never forgive myself if I spooked her or made her feel uncomfortable around me….if I lost her. She doesn't have many people in her life that she can depend on. I have to be her friend right now."

"You can't be both?"

Elliot turned his head to look at Lily and raised an eyebrow.

"Can't you be her best friend and still be the man who restores her faith in romantic relationships at the same time? Maybe you are exactly what she needs. You love her as a friend, so you are already programmed to be considerate to things that most boyfriends are not. And she trusts you, she already trusts you."

"What if I let her down?"

"It is simple….don't. I may just be a dumb kid, but even I know that the strongest relationships are based on friendship, not sex or romance."

Elliot turned his head and blinked at her half in shock of what he was hearing.

"I mean, of course those things are important too. But if you truly love her as a friend, then you will be patient and sweet with her about the sex part. And when she feels that she is really safe with you, she will open up to you about that too."

"You are just a kid, how do you know all of this stuff about grown up relationships?"

"My mom was hurt, too. Like how that man hurt Olivia. It was someone she trusted, a guy she really liked. She still hasn't gotten past it."

Elliot felt a knot in his throat sensing something terrible had happened to this child.

"Have you ever tried talking to your mother? Like you are talking to me now?"

"She won't talk to me. She doesn't think I understand. But I do understand…." she hesitated for a moment as he stared into her eyes, "because he did it to me, too."

Elliot stood dumbfounded trying to think of something to say.

"Lily, I am sorry. Have you told anyone? Talked to someone about this?"

"I talk to Liv."

"Have you told the police? You know, if you can come down to work with me and give me a description I will find the guy that hurt you and make sure he goes to prison," Elliot promised knowing very well it wasn't that simple.

"I already took care of it."

"You did? How?"

Lily looked around the room and her eyes rested on a weary woman sitting alone at the end of a table.

"My mom didn't believe me. He was her boyfriend. She thought I was doing something bad. But I wasn't. I cried and I begged him to stop. But he kept coming into my room at night. No one was going to help me. So I had to help myself," she gulped as tears began to flood her eyes. "Excuse me," she said softly laying the potato peeler on the table and brushing past him.

Elliot felt his heart sink in his chest, knowing exactly what that child had felt she had to do.

"How's it going?" Olivia asked reappearing from behind him.

"It's….going. Listen, Liv, I think I did something really stupid."

"They are just potatoes, El. I'm sure all will be forgiven," she replied with a delicate smile.

"No, with Lily. We were just talking and I was just kind of rolling with it. She's a great kid."

"She is."

"For a moment I slipped into cop mode. And I think I may have pushed her to tell me more than she was ready to share."

Olivia pressed her lips together for a moment as she looked around the room.

"Why don't we take a break and go for a walk?" she suggested reaching for his arm.

"Are you sure?"

"Yea, you've been peeling for hours and they are almost finished. We will find something else to do to help out when we get back. Walk with me."

"Alright."

"Why don't you grab us both a cup of coffee and I'm gonna use the ladies room first," she suggested and he knew she was going to check on Lily. "I'll just be a second."

"Okay."

Ten minutes later Olivia joined him outside and they began to walk around the block as he handed her a cup of coffee.

"Is she alright?"

"She's okay," Olivia said with a smile.

"I never meant to hurt her. Liv."

"I know. Lily, trusts you, Elliot."

"I just met her today."

"Well, she's a pretty good judge of character," Olivia admitted with a smile.

"She was raped? By her mother's boyfriend. Mom didn't believe her?"

Olivia pressed her lips together and watched as he pit the pieces together.

"They barely speak. We see it all the time. The mother blames the kid and the kid…."

"Has nowhere to turn."

"Maybe I should have explained things a little better before leaving you with her."

"I get it, Liv. It was self defense for what the bastard was doing to her. No one else would protect her, so she had to protect herself."

"No, El, she stabbed him in the back as he was walking away from her and then slit his throat. Then she tried to kill herself. They shipped her off to a Psych ward for months."

"She stabbed him in the back, that doesn't sound sexually motivated."

"Lily refused to speak at all for weeks. When her 90 day hold was up at Bellevue she became a ward of the state and they sent her to a Juvenile detention center. Eventually she came here for court ordered therapy and several Psych evaluations later they let her volunteer here."

"So she murdered a man and got a 90 day Psych hold?"

"That was over three years ago, Elliot."

"She was eleven years old when she killed the man?"

"She caught him sneaking into her younger sister's bedroom. Kaylee was five."

Olivia stared into his eyes and suddenly he understood the pain this child was feeling.

"No one protected her. She had no one to save her from the monster and she wasn't going to let it happen to her sister. She is the victim here, not the predator."

"And her mother blames her for killing her boyfriend and getting the youngest daughter taken by the state."

"You let monsters rape your babies, how do you have the nerve to call your self a mother?"

"People are damaged, Elliot. All people. Deep down we all have something wrong with us."

"It's a fucked up world we live in."

"It is. But this need to want to help one another, this….compassion. That is what separated the good guys from the bad guys. And right now, I really need to feel like a good guy again."

"Liv, you have always been one of the good guys."

"I hope so," she said softly. "At times over these last few months I haven't really know who I was. It's like I look in the mirror and I'm not there anymore."

"You're there," he said brushing a bit of stray hair back as he stared into her eyes. "I see you, I know you are there. And you are the same amazing person you have always been."

He could tell she was struggling to hold onto herself. And things had been confusing for her these past few months as cop blurred with victim and left her questioning everything she had known about herself. Olivia stood here fighting for an identity to figure out for herself once more exactly who and what she was and even wounded like this, she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

Heart and determination were two of her best features, the fact that all of this incredible soul came in such a physically attractive package was purely coincidental and an added bonus. To him she wasn't damaged, she was real. And his magnetic attraction to her left him defective as well.

That afternoon, they stood side by side and served meals to over eight hundred people. Afterward, after parking the car in front of her building, Elliot offered to buy her dinner. They walked to a little hole in the wall pizzeria a few blocks down to grab a slice and a beer. Elliot watched her as she sat there drinking a glass of some cheap house wine and laughed at ever stupid joke he made. She was the only woman who had ever really gotten him. And now here she sat with that blissful smile and rosy cheeks completely unaware of the fact that she held his heart in the palm of her hand.

"It's getting late," he injected as she focused her attention out the window. "I should get you home."

Olivia smiled at his attempt to be honorable.

On the walk home he bought her a soft pretzel from one of her favorite vendors and they made small talk.

"The moon is incredible tonight," she remarked staring up at it's full glow.

"Beautiful," Elliot agreed focusing on the way it's light seemed to dance on her hair.

"Almost makes this feel like a date," she confessed watching closely with her big eyes as she caught him staring at her.

Was she flirting with him? Elliot smiled pausing for a moment and letting her get a few steps ahead before catching up to her. He moved closer to her side as they walked along. He dropped his arm to his side letting his finger tips brush against hers until he found her hand in his, not really sure who had reached out for who.

He locked his fingers between hers and paused only for a moment at the top of the steps before she stepped forward still clutching to his hand silently inviting him inside. Elliot hesitated for a moment and she stopped and leaned back against the building to look at him.

His heart melted as she smiled her pretty smile.

"Good night, Liv," he said softly leaning forward and placing a soft kiss on her forehead.

"Night, El," she breathed and his nose gently grazed hers as he pulled back.

She blinked her thick dark lashes unknowingly leaving little butterfly kisses on his cheek and she stared into him. Elliot fought it as hard as he could, but the next thing he knew his hand was cupped against her cheek and they were sharing their first real kiss.

His head was screaming at him to pull back, but his heart was telling him to go for it as he slid his thumb gently around the curve of her jaw and their lips parted slowly. He heard her gasp breathless and could feel her heart pounding wildly between them. He had never wanted anything or any one more than he wanted her right now. Her eyes were still closed when he looked at her and a series of smaller kisses followed.

He slipped his free arm around her waist pulling her closer and deeper into his arms as he felt his tongue enter her mouth once more. There was no falling involved, he thought as he realized the seriousness of the moment. He was desperately, helplessly, inevitably, hopelessly, seriously, deeply in love with Olivia.

He felt her turn her head to the side, breaking their embrace. Her eyes were still closed and Elliot studied her carefully trying to figure out the best thing to say.

"You should probably be going," she choked out still avoiding eye contact with him.

"Liv…."

"I can't do this," she gasped as tears began to stream down her face. "I don't know how," she looked into him with pleading eyes.

"It's okay," he whispered brushing away her tears. The last thing he ever wanted to do was make her feel unsafe. "We don't have to do anything."

The grip she had on his shoulder loosened and her hand dropped as he turned to go. Descending the stairs in front of her building he turned and headed down the sidewalk toward his car.

"El," he heard a soft and shaky voice say from behind him.

Elliot turned to look back at her.

"I want this. I just…" he watched as she shook her head unable to find the words to explain. "I don't know how to get past where I am."

Elliot closed the car door and walked back up the steps. Olivia's eyes widened and she felt nervous as he came dangerously close to her, then he smiled.

"I want it, too. I want you. I want to at least give _us_ a shot at something real. It's okay to be scared, Liv. It's okay to be nervous. The truth is I don't really know how to do this either. Not the right way, anyhow. So," he said taking her hand in his and holding it as he exhaled, "if you are willing to give it a shot. We could take things slow. And just see where this leads. And maybe we can figure it all out together."

He watched as she smiled slowly and raised her fingertips to his face. She smoothed them around and stopped resting two fingers against his mouth, then shifted her eyes to gaze into his. Elliot couldn't help but smile as she leaned forward and kissed him tenderly.

"I think that is a wonderful idea," she whispered as she smiled.

Elliot slipped his arms around her as she closed her eyes and buried her face in against his collar bone. And he just held tight to her, feeling her raise her arms and tighten them around him as well.

"This…whatever it is," she confessed, "it just feels right."

"Nothing has ever felt so right," he agreed kissing her forehead once more.

Olivia shivered as an icy wind began to blow, reminding them it was actually winter.

"You should get inside, before you get sick. I can walk up," he suggested partly out of concern for her safety and partly because he just wasn't ready to let go of her hand.

Olivia smiled and blinked her beautiful eyes.

"No funny stuff, I promise."

Olivia laughed just a little and reached behind her to open the door with her free hand. With her fingers locked in his they climbed two flights of stairs and stopped at the door to her apartment.

"I would invite you in," she began, " but I don't think I am ready for that."

"That's okay," he said with a smile.

Elliot backed up a bit and she stepped into him burying her head in his chest and hugging him tight. He smiled and leaned down just a bit until he found the place where she fit just right. Placing his chin against the top of her head, held her lovingly in his arms.

Olivia exhaled and tipped her head back to look up at him as she smiled. Then she raised up to kiss him with a slow and passionate kiss.

"Thank you," she whispered, "for a wonderful day. And an amazing evening, too."

"Anytime," he said with a smile stealing one more kiss before he turned to head back down the stairs. "Good night, Olivia."

She smiled the prettiest smile he had ever seen.

"Goodnight, Elliot."

Back at home Elliot was just about to settle into bed for the night as his cell phone rang and he smiled uncontrollably.

"Hey you," he said unable to contain his excitement, "you call for another bedtime story?"

"Wha…"

Elliot cleared his throat at the sound of Fin's voice.

"Elliot, man, we got him!"

"Wait, what?" Elliot asked.

"Thompson. We have him in custody. We've got the bastard that raped Olivia."


	13. 13 Spark

_**Spark:**_

_**1) something capable of development: **__a latent trace of something capable of development; __**2) something that activates: **__a factor or device that sets off or acts as a stimulant, inspiration, or catalyst; __**3) electric discharge: **__a quick bright discharge of electricity between two conductors _

_Beyond The Shadow Of A Doubt_

_(Chapter Thirteen: Spark)_

Olivia exhaled as she stared at the door.

"Remember, they can't see you," Elliot pointed out.

"El," she said with a soft smile, "I know how this works."

"I still think it's crap that they wont let me go in there with you. I won't say anything, I just think I should be there for support."

"I know you do. They just want to make sure we do everything by the books so we can get a conviction that will stick. I can do this."

"Liv, it's time," Cragen said stepping from the darkened room where she hoped to identify the man who had attacked her.

"I though you were going to be in there?" Elliot asked as their boss made his way back toward his office.

"They thought my presence could be a distraction."

"What kind of crap is that? They are going to make her go in there alone? With no one but that douche bag's attorney…." he trailed off as he watched Olivia fidget nervously.

"You know the rules. Unless she is under age no family or friends are permitted inside that room. We will be right here when she comes out, but that is the best I can do."

"I won't be alone, Elliot. Casey will be in there with me."

"Casey is a lawyer."

"Who also happens to be a dear friend," Olivia reminded him. "They wont let anyone from this department in there with me because I work with you all. I guess it is considered a conflict of interest or something. They did offer to let a uniform stand in, but I really don't see any point."

Elliot walked over to her taking her hand in his.

"I just know how hard this has been on you," he said softly as he stared into her eyes. "I promised you I would be there for you."

Olivia smiled sweetly.

"And you are here for me," she whispered as she twisted his tie in her fingers.

Elliot smiled as he brushed a bit of bangs from her eyes with his fingertip, then continued his finger softly down her cheek. She blinked and smiled as she stared into him with her pretty brown eyes.

"I have to learn to do this for myself, El. It is only going to get harder from here and I have to be able to face him or he will get away with what he's done. To me and to all of those other women. And as much as I know you want to be there, as much as I'd love to have you there beside me, you just can't be there the entire time."

He cupped her jaw in his hand and smiled as he rubbed his nose against hers. He knew she was right.

"Maybe I am being over protective. But it's only because I care so much about you," he confessed.

"I know," she whispered placing her hand over his on her cheek.

Elliot stood dangerously close to her as he tipped his head and scanned the room with his eyes to see if anyone was watching them.

"Can I kiss you?" he whispered as she smiled.

"A little risky, don't you think? No one knows. And what if Cragen sees us?"

"He's in his office with the door and the blinds shut," Elliot offered in defense.

Olivia glanced back over her shoulder as a few random people buzzed around the room not even noticing them. She smiled as she raised up on her tip toes and placed a soft, slow kiss against his lips. As she pulled back Elliot smoothed his thumb over her full red lips and kissed her once more, this time deeper and sweeter and more passionate.

"We're gonna get caught," she said pulling back with her eyes still closed as she smiled only half in protest.

"Can't help it. When you care about someone as much as I care about you it is hard to hide the way you feel."

"I'd better get in there before they come looking for me," she said and Elliot kissed the back of her hand.

"I'll be right here waiting when you are finished. Maybe you'll let me buy you lunch."

"Maybe," she said shooting him a flirty smile to lighten the mood as she walked inside and closed the door behind her.

Elliot paced the floor and sat on the corner of his desk for what seemed like hours before the door finally opened. He watched as Thompson's lawyer stepped out laughing and cracking jokes with a very un-amused Casey. But Olivia never came out.

"Case, how'd she do?" he asked his eye never leaving the doorway.

"She did great. She identified him with no trouble at all. First by voice alone, then the moment they brought the lights up and she saw his face. His lawyer made her review all of the men twice and she picked him out again. It was a crystal clear positive identification that will stand wonderfully in court."

"That's great. Where is she?"

"She said she needed a moment. His lawyer made a few comments aimed toward me about battling it out in court and I think he may have spooked her. I tried to get her to talk to me, but she said she just wanted to be alone."

"You did a great job counselor. Thanks," Elliot assured her as he made his way into the room where Olivia sat crying in the corner.

He turned back and pushed the door shut, then took a seat beside her in the floor.

"Tell me about it," he whispered softly pulling her into him and kissing the top of her head.

"There's nothing to tell," Olivia gasped as she sobbed.

"Casey said it went really well. In her words it was a crystal clear positive identification and will stand wonderfully in court."

Olivia couldn't help but laugh through her tears at the way he playfully mocked their friend.

"I just didn't realize it would be this hard seeing him again. As I stood there looking at him, I swear he was looking at me. Into my eyes, into my soul. I could feel him staring me down and just like that it all came rushing back. Every second of the attack like it happened moments ago. The smell of him, the taste of him as he forced his tongue into my mouth. Now I can't get it out of my head. I know we needed this for court, but I wish I'd never looked through that glass. I was just starting to get on with my life. To move forward and start again….with you. And now…."

"Liv, if we are moving too fast….or if you need to give it a rest for a while, I'll understand."

"Really?" she looked at him with tears in her eyes.

Elliot gulped just now realizing the full extent of his offer.

"Well, yea. I care more about you than anyone else in the world. And what I want more than anything is to be with you. But I think maybe you need a friend right now more than a boyfriend and with everything else that is going on, maybe this isn't the best time to start a fledgling relationship. We could just take a break for a while. Get through this trial and then when you are ready we can pick back up again."

"Is that what you want?" she asked softly.

"Well, no. I mean I want to be with you. And I want to do that whenever is best for you. When you feel like you are ready. So if you feel like we should break things off for a while, that's alright."

"I don't."

"You don't?"

"No. I think that you, this," she said locking her fingers between his and squeezing his hand, "is the only thing keeping me sane right now."

"I'm sorry, I just thought by the way you reacted that you wanted to break up."

"Oh, no. I guess I was just a little shocked that you would have been so understanding about it if I had wanted to. Most guys wouldn't have been. Of course, you are not like most guys."

"I try not to be."

Olivia smiled and buried her face against his chest drawing in a deep breath of him. The smell of his cologne and his laundry soap and the feel of his arms as they tightened around her, this was her safety. The one place she knew she could always go to escape the rest of the world.

Things were quiet for a little while as he just held her. Elliot smiled when he realized her tears had stopped and he thought she had fallen asleep.

"Liv?"

"Hum?" she mumbled in response.

"Why don't you let me take you home? Take the rest of the day off and get some rest. It's been a rough morning."

"No, I'm fine now."

"So fine you just sat here in the floor and fell asleep."

She sat up causing his arm to slide down around her waist as she tipped her head to look up at him and smile.

"I wasn't asleep."

"No? I almost was."

Olivia giggled just a bit.

"What? It's dark and cozy all snuggled up with a pretty girl….that is how I like to sleep."

"Thank you, El."

"For what?" he asked with a smirk.

"Just for being you. You always seem to know exactly how to make me feel better."

Elliot smiled as she kissed him tenderly. As she pulled back from the kiss she opened her eyes and stared into his. She smiled and leaned forward to kiss him again, this time with more heat and more passion.

Olivia moved forward, sitting on his lap as she brushed her nose against his and kissed him again. Inside, Elliot was aching for this thing between them to go further, but he knew that wasn't something she was ready for.

"Liv," he mumbled between her amazing kisses.

"Yea?" she laughed playfully.

"Maybe we should stop," he replied pulling his mouth from hers though everything in his body screamed for more.

"Stop? Why? What's wrong? You didn't like it?"

"Oh, I liked it."

"I know I am a little rusty at this, but I am pretty sure I still know how to kiss. I used to be a really good kisser. Am I not a good kisser?"

"You are….incredible," he said with a sigh sliding her off his lap to sit beside him in the floor once more.

"I don't understand. If I am doing something wrong you can just tell me and I won't do it anymore."

Elliot locked his fingers between hers and kissed her hand.

"Nothing is wrong," she said kissing the tip of her nose in the darkness. "I just…."

It was silent only for a second before his stomach growled in protest lightening the mood and they both laughed.

"Didn't you say something about buying me lunch?" he joked as she laughed again.

"Me? I believe it was you who offered to buy me lunch."

"Oh is that how it was?"

"I believe so, yes."

"Well, then you'd better decide where we are going before we both starve."

She stood and helped her up. Elliot was glad it was dark in the room, because the lack of light made it easier for him to hide the erection that had been forming between them.

"Olivia," he said pulling her back and kissing her tenderly before she opened the door.

"Yes?"

"You are not doing anything wrong," he said with a smile. "So don't be so nervous. Every move, every touch, every kiss, was perfect."

She smiled.

"But we are at work and no one knows about us and I just don't want us to get carried away, you know?" he asked.

"Yea, I know," she replied with a soft smile.

"Probably better to stop before we let things get too far out of hand," he said with a wink and she laughed.


End file.
